When I read that the Twilight movie franchise was being resurrected with a series of five short films, my reaction was akin to a cat trying to get a hairball out of its throat. But then I read the thing that all the shorts will have in common and... readers, I didn't think I'd ever say this, but... Twilight. I am proud of you.
In the not too distant future, somewhere in movie theaters, Mike Nelson and his RiffTrax pals could be making fun of Twilight live for your entertainment. That's right, the RiffTrax team wants to do another of their simulcast live events where they make fun of a movie, and they want that movie to be Twilight. To do that though, they have to acquire the rights to the film, which can be expensive. They've launched a Kickstarter campaign that is already over three times its goal, but that still might not be enough to make this happen -- and I really, really want this to happen.
Orson Scott Card and his work (both in fiction and as a board member of the anti-gay National Organization for Marriage) have been at the center of a brewing controversy in the comics industry, ever since DC's recent announcement that he'd be one of the writers on a digital-first Superman anthology. And unlike most comics controversies, this one is actually reaching the occasional mainstream news outlet, a fact which has not gone unnoticed by executives at the company in charge of a big-budget adaptation of Card's Ender's Game, Summit Entertainment, according to The Hollywood Reporter.
In 2009 Jonathan McIntosh made a six minute long video by splicing together clips from Twilight and Buffy the Vampire Slayer (and just a tiny, tiny bit of Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire), where Edward Cullen finds his vampire instincts turning his affections towards Buffy Summers, and he bites off quite a bit more than his fangs can properly chew. At the time, Summit Entertainment had better things to do than shut down cleverly made internet videos with millions of views and a Webby nomination, but everything changed when the Fire Nation -
No, I mean. Everything changed when Summit Entertainment, and therefore The Twilight Saga was acquired by Lionsgate a year ago.
There's been a lot of talk about how Hollywood doesn't believe female-led films will make money at the box office and that's why so few are made. This year not only proved them wrong, it proved them wrong in a big way. Indie studio Lionsgate has done something they've never done before - in 2012, they had two films both make over $125 million in North American theaters. The films? The Hunger Games and Twilight: Breaking Dawn Part 2.
Take a look at this picture to the left. What does it remind you of? Anything? Or is it just a sketch of a woman with pretty hair? This piece of work by artist Kelly Howlett is actually the latter. It has no real title, except for the date "11-20-09." If that date sounds familiar to you because you are a die-hard fan of The Twilight Saga, it's because that is the same date that New Moon was released. You are probably still wondering what we're writing about here, because this seems like these two things -- Howlett's sketch and Twilight -- have nothing to do with each other. Well, Summit Entertainment, which owns all rights to The Twilight Saga, thinks it has enough to do with Twilight to warrant an email to Zazzle, where the sketch was being sold, claiming "infringement." We'll remind you: This sketch has nothing to do with Twilight.
The Ender's Game movie seems to be moving along pretty quickly now with casting notices popping up left and right. Two more actors have just been confirmed, Harrison Ford and Abigail Breslin. Hit the jump for all the details. Also, crap, Abigail Breslin finally grew up.
So they found a director for Die Hard 5, which according to the Mohs scale of mineral hardness puts this particular death alongside cobalt, obsidian, and tooth enamel. It's John Moore, in case anyone was interested.
We're much more interested in another related-only-by-the-serendipity-of-Bruce-Willis tidbit of news: that Die Hard 5 is trying to get off the ground and finished before Summit Entertainment makes good on the roughly $120 million in profits it made on last summer's Red and puts its sequel into production.
Why are we interested? Could it be getting to watch Dame Helen Mirren wielding some more giant guns? Well...
Summit Entertainment has scored the rights to Orson Scott Card's Ender's Game, which will be adapted by Gavin Hood (Tsotsi, X-Men Origins: Wolverine) into a live-action film. Hood will be writing the screenplay and directing, and Card will be among the producers. Now that Summit's Twilight franchise is ending, will this be their next successful youth-driven series? And will this provide some competition against Lionsgate's adaptation of The Hunger Games?
As announced by Summit Entertainment yesterday, Erich and Jon Hoeber, the writers behind the screenplay of RED, are at work scripting a second installment of the story. No word yet on what the sequel will entail, plot-wise, but anyone who saw the first movie will be aware that it sets up for a sequel.
A sequel that has John Malkovich in drag.
After a kinda useless ten-second trailer for The Twilight Saga: Eclipse came out yesterday, the folks at Twilight, Inc. (read: Summit Entertainment) released the full trailer for Twilight: Eclipse this morning.
Twilight has a strange power to inspire nerd-rage because it is not Lord of the Rings, or even Harry Potter, and yet it presumes to come up with its own mythology, involving vampires and werewolves. How dare it! Also, Twilight is for girls, and girls are gross.
In truth, we can't pretend to be huge Twilight fans, but neither is Twilight the scourge of the earth: