Frequent Misspelling Of “Suites” Prompts Retailer To Offer Solid-Chocolate Bathroom Set
For your golden tickets and your oompa loompa dippity doos.
God bless Bathrooms.com. The online retailer of bidets, toilets and other traditionally inedible fixtures is now descending a delicious slippery slope by selling powder-room appliances made entirely out of chocolate. Here’s a statement explaining the decision, because “we are mad, unstoppable geniuses” was apparently insufficient:
Our area of expertise has not historically been confectionary! Nevertheless, of the millions of Google searches for sweet related terms each month, a number of these come to our web site. Why? Because people are regularly searching for “bathroom sweets”.
Were people looking to find loo-specific treats, or was this just a simple case of bad spelling?
The answer is pretty obvious. Clearly people wanted bathroom suites, and they just got it a bit wrong. But that got us thinking: just how do bad spelling, a love of confectionery and bathrooms come together like that?
God knows how the site will address inevitable dessert/desert confusion.
Like any other rational retailer, Bathrooms.com responded to the misspelled Google searches by enlisting the help of delightfully-named British chocolatier Choccywoccydoodah to build a $113,196, 9.4 million-calorie toilet/sink/bidet/bathtub set. The 210,000 calorie “sweet bidet” alone will run you $11,656 and is described as “tasting better than it works–” so for enterprising homemakers out there, I suggest getting more bubble for your buck by letting the fixture double as a fondue fountain.
Of course, if you’re watching your waistline, the Willy Wonka of washrooms promises you don’t have to eat the furniture (FUNiture?) to get your money’s worth, since the appliances will remain solid for six months if kept at room temperature. Taking cold baths for half a year seems like a fair price for the luxury of Choccywoccydoodah-ing all the bidet.
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