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  1. Woman Sues Company For Putting Her High School Yearbook Photo On A Flask

    I'm going to be the most popular girl in civil court!

    As readers of The Mary Sue, we're going to guess that many of you have at least a passing familiarity with the Anne Taintor line of memorabilia, which features smiling young mid-20th century housewife-types accompanied by delightfully disagreeable sayings. But we bet you'd probably be upset if you were walking through a gift shop and found yourself on just such a flask.

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  2. Two Gals Get In the Holiday Spirit, Craft Shots That Taste Like Girl Scout Cookies

    Can "Thin Mint" be my signature drink?

    Entertaining guests like a mature adult can be rewarding, but grown-up parties are often sadly bereft of drizzled chocolate or coconut shavings. But here's a tutorial that shows you how to get your amateur mixologist on and combine the best of both possible worlds (alcohol + dessert)! And remember: should your sweet creations make you crave actual non-liquid cookies, you can now do your Girl Scout shopping online. Truly we live in a magical time.

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  3. U.S. Finally Gets Its Clammy Hands on Hangover “Cure” Berocca With Bonkers Joel McHale Commercial


    The U.S. is finally catching up with the rest of the world! Everyone rejoice! What? No, I don't mean in education or healthcare—this is far more important. I'm talking about hangover cures. Yes, we're finally getting a full-scale launch of the rest of the world's favorite* hangover cure*: Berocca. *Actual favorite-ness and cure-ness not guaranteed.

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  4. Study Shows Drinking Alcohol Improves Your Sense of Smell, Scientific Wonders Never Cease

    Drink alcohol, smell great! Wait...

    Science says alcohol makes you smell better! Thanks science! Oh, wait, sorry—alcohol improves your sense of smell, according to new research into the wondrous powers that humans gain from alcohol. It doesn't, in fact, make you smell better. It mostly just makes you smell like alcohol.

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  5. Turns out That the Feds Approving Powdered Alcohol Was Maybe Kind of an Accident

    Damn it, no takesies-backsies!

    Damn it, Alcohol and Tobacco Tax and Trade Bureau, you have one job: make sure that people don't do really weird and possibly dangerous stuff with alcohol. Well, that and keep little kids from thinking that smoking is cool, or whatever. All right, you have two jobs.

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  6. Brace Yourself: Powdered Alcohol Soon to Be a Thing

    Instant Hangover—just add water!

    Tired of having to lug bottle after bottle home from the liquor store? Palcohol, i.e. not-at-all-shady alcohol in powdered form, has been approved by the federal government and may be available soon in a water bottle/bowl of cereal/cup of coffee near you. Ron Swanson would not approve.

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  7. Ingredients In Tequila May Fight Diabetes, Obesity, Inhibitions

    I must be the healthiest girl alive.

    America has a surprising new ally in our fight against diabetes and obesity: Dr.Jose Cuervo. New research shows that ingredients found in tequila may provide the healthiest way ever of satisfying your sweet tooth, and no not all of that research was conducted on St. Patrick's Day this past Monday.

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  8. New British Pub Actually Just Elaborate Psychological Experiment

    Where everybody knows your name... and your blood type... and your social security number.

    A night out at London's South Bank University's new pub is great--if you're a lab rat, that is. The deceptive new bar was built solely study the effects of alcohol consumption on behavior, and you're welcome to come in and have a pint, just ignore all the surveillance equipment.

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  9. Pregnant Women Who Drink Wine Have Better Behaved Kids, But Not Because of the Alcohol

    Was this study done by thirsty pregnant women?

    There's certainly evidence to show that drinking too much during pregnancy is bad, but counter to that, a new study found that women who drank one glass of wine per week during pregnancy had better behaved children than teetotallers. That's not an invitation to start drinking if you're pregnant. Read on.

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  10. Know the Facts About AAA’s “Tipsy Tow” Program Before You Get Drunk on New Year’s Eve

    This shouldn't be anyone's first plan anyway.

    We've noticed a lot of people sharing information and misinformation about AAA's "Tipsy Tow" program on social media leading up to New Year's Eve, so we thought we'd do our part to clear things up. They'll tow you and your car home for free, but it's not available everywhere. Here's how to find out if it's available in your area.

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  11. Monkeys Show Alcohol May Boost Your Immune System, Your Post-Christmas Hangover Isn’t for Nothing

    Your immune system is like Jackie Chan in Drunken Master.

    If you had a few Christmas drinks to help you deal with your family yesterday, you may have actually been doing yourself more of a favor than you thought. According to a study recently published in the journal Vaccine, moderate drinking boosted response to vaccination in monkeys. Cheers.

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  12. Geekosystem Podcast Episode 13 “Elfnog”

    We're day-drinking at work for science!

    It's our Christmas episode! We decided to celebrate by determining what liquor tastes best in eggnog with an "experiment." Sometimes experiments mean drinking at work. We're also joined again by Weekend Editor Sam Maggs to talk about our Editors' Picks for this week.

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  13. Science Says Moderate Alcohol Consumption May Help You Live Longer

    So then heavy alcohol consumption leads to immortality? That's how that works, right?

    Cheers! A new study published in Alcoholism: Clinical and Experimental Research suggests that drinking may help you live longer! Don't get too excited. It seems that only moderate drinking has this effect, so you can't just start chugging grain alcohol to become immortal. Yeah, we were disappointed, too.

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  14. Celebrate the 80th Anniversary of Repeal Day with These 35 Geeky Cocktails, Just Not All at Once

    Go home, Prohibition! You're drunk!

    80 Years ago today, Prohibition was repealed, and everyone raised a glass to celebrate. We think it's as good a reason as any to drink at work, so with the help of our friend Chris-Rachael Oseland from The Kitchen Overlord, we've put together a list of 35 geeky cocktails we think you should (responsibly) try.

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  15. How To Make Your Own Pan Galactic Gargle Blaster [VIDEO]

    Don't Panic

    You know the one. The Best Drink in Existence, the effects of which are similar to "having your brains smashed in by a slice of lemon wrapped round a large gold brick." If you can make this, then you really know where your towel is.

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  16. The Entertainment Flask Looks Like Your Favorite NES Cartridges, This Is Your Adulthood

    Maybe our video game addiction isn't the one our parents should've been worried about?

    Ink Whiskey LLC has passed its Kickstarter goal for the Entertainment Flask, so you'll soon be able to carry your liquor around in a flask that looks just like an original NES cartridge. Now you can hide your real collection of booze inside a fake collection of NES cartridges with humorous, alcohol themed labels that may homage to gaming classics.

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  17. Things We Saw Today: A Wine-o-Saur

    Things We Saw Today

    Alternatively, a dino wino. (For sale at Uncommon Goods, via That's Nerdalicious)

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  18. Scientists in the UK Are Developing a Drug That Mimics Alcohol without the Negative Effects

    Consequences are for suckers.

    Professor David Nutt, a Former Government drug advisor, and his team at Imperial College London are developing a drug that will mimic alcohol's "positive" effects on the brain without hangovers or addictive qualities. If only we'd realized sooner that consequences, not poor judgement and impaired reflexes, are the problem with too much drinking.

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  19. Snake Bites Woman 3 Months After She Bottled It in Wine

    Maybe don't put live snakes in wine bottles?

    A woman in northern China surnamed Liu was attacked by a snake. Why am I telling you this? Because that snake had been soaking in a closed wine bottle for three months before it struck Liu. She had been making snake wine, which I guess is a thing, and when she went to add more alcohol the snake made its move. This is not the first of these attacks.

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  20. Man Fined $500 For Drinking A Severed Human Toe In A Shot

    You don't eat the toe, you brute! It's a damned garnish! Do you eat your parsley, too?

    You read that headline right -- a man was served a human toe in a shot, and instead of suing everyone in a 10-block radius, he is being fined $500. That's what happens when you botch Dawson City's famous Sourtoe Shot -- a shot of Yukon Jack served with a preserved human toe in it. But your not supposed to drink the toe! Come on, that's just silly.

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