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Cabinet Office Light Switches Prove Too Complicated for Trump’s Aides, So They Work in the Dark

Q: How many aides does it take to change a lightbulb? A: I don't know, but let's give this crushing darkness a chance.

Trump

Of all the symbolic and metaphorical thinkpieces to come out regarding Donald Trump’s current regime administration, none of them compare to the the New York Times‘ fully factual account of what it’s like to work within the White House. I’m not even kidding when I say that they’re totally in the dark about the most basic tenets of the law: Trump’s aides don’t know how to turn on the light in the cabinet room.

The NYT piece mostly focuses on Trump’s atrocious immigration ban and the current fallout surrounding its rejection by a handful of federal judges. But the introduction includes a description of White House working life:

Aides confer in the dark because they cannot figure out how to operate the light switches in the cabinet room. Visitors conclude their meetings and then wander around, testing doorknobs until finding one that leads to an exit. In a darkened, mostly empty West Wing, Mr. Trump’s provocative chief strategist, Stephen K. Bannon, finishes another 16-hour day planning new lines of attack.

If stumbling around in the dark doesn’t exactly get you thinking about the sheer incompetence being displayed by the appointed staff in the highest office in the land, then the image of visitors having to grasp at doorknobs and walls to find the exit should absolutely do it for you. It all just feels like mice trapped in a maze, some massive social experiment gone wrong, with scientists off somewhere laughing at the display.

Honestly, though, the darkness that is the West Wing seems to match the soul of Trump’s neo-Nazi chief strategist, Bannon. Lest we forget: much of that immigration order was authored by Bannon, who, as each day passes in this darkened White House, seems to be the real President, pulling Trump’s strings and manipulating things from behind his orange body.

The internet has collectively latched onto this idea, getting #PresidentBannon to trend worldwide on more than a few occasions over the past week or so. What’s more, all that talk seems to be getting to Trump. Further down in the NYT piece:

But for the moment, Mr. Bannon remains the president’s dominant adviser, despite Mr. Trump’s anger that he was not fully briefed on details of the executive order he signed giving his chief strategist a seat on the National Security Council, a greater source of frustration to the president than the fallout from the travel ban.

Truth be told, the thought of neo-Nazi Bannon having a hold of Trump’s ear was bad enough, but the thought of him being the hand by which these terrible things keep happening only deepens the horror. But the NYT article leads one to wonder if Trump’s frustration with Bannon could ever lead to him maybe even standing up against him.

When it comes down to it, pieces like this one reveal just how utterly critical it is to not only work on removing Trump from office, but also the garbage human beings who make up his staff. With each passing day, Bannon seems to be digging in deeper and deeper. While it’s fun to laugh at these hapless aides who can’t seem to find the light in the dark tunnel that is the White House, don’t forget: these are the people running the country.

(via The Slot, image via Albert H. Teich/Shutterstock.com)

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Jessica Lachenal is a writer who doesn’t talk about herself a lot, so she isn’t quite sure how biographical info panels should work. But here we go anyway. She's the Weekend Editor for The Mary Sue, a Contributing Writer for The Bold Italic (thebolditalic.com), and a Staff Writer for Spinning Platters (spinningplatters.com). She's also been featured in Model View Culture and Frontiers LA magazine, and on Autostraddle. She hopes this has been as awkward for you as it has been for her.