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Things We Saw Today: ACLU Celebrates #NationalColoringBookDay With Some Lovely RBG Pictures

In case you weren't aware, today is #NationalColoringBookDay, and if you needed an excuse to take some quiet time out of the day to color some books, I'm going to go ahead and say that's a-okay.

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Things We Saw Today: Clark Gregg to Perform “Toxic” For Lip Sync Battle

Dubsmash rivals Clark Gregg and Hayley Atwell's lip sync battle is airing on Thursday, and Gregg's "Toxic" promises an amazing performance.

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Missing Link (of Spiders) Likely Found With 305-Million-Year-Old Arachnid

So this is the monster from Stephen King's It?

If digging up long-dead animals doesn't exactly sound exciting to you, consider that we're still missing relatively large pieces of some evolutionary puzzles, and finding them could increase our understanding of life as we know it. ... Or it could bring us creepy-looking "almost spiders." That's also a possibility, as we now know.

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Scientists Debunk Spider-Man’s Powers & Explain Why He’s More Like Frog-Man, If Anything

If scientists wanted to develop a suit that could mimic Spider-Man's wall-crawling powers, they'd have to include a pair of very large sticky shoes ... a US size 114 shoe, to be specific.

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Wolf Spider’s Mating “Purr” Recorded by Scientists, Is Just as Hellish as You’d Imagine

NO. No. Nope. Nein. Non. Negative.

The soundtrack of my soul shriveling up and dying.

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Things We Saw Today: Fannibals Rejoice, Here’s Your Hannibal Premiere Date

Gillian, stahp.

Ugh, this picture is perfection.

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Australia Banned a Kids’ Show Episode for Spreading Lies That Spiders Are Friendly

♫Spider-ban. Spider-ban.♫

A kids' show not originally intended for audiences in regions where the wildlife is actively trying to kill you made the mistake of telling Australian children that spiders aren't scary and we can be their friends, which is factually inaccurate in Australia.

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Things We Saw Today: Awesome Alien Queen Cosplay Wins Halloween Forever

Quick! There's still time!

Rushing for a last-minute Halloween costume? If you're quick, you can check out this awesome Instructable on how to create your own xenomorph queen outfit! She's just dying to eat you—er, meat you—er. Uh. yeah.

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Just When You Thought It Was Safe To Get Back In The Water, Spiders Are Now Eating Fish

Nature. Staaaaaaahp.

Go to bed with the lights on and never come out: research published yesterday reveals that a staggering variety of spiders across the globe are semi-aquatic and catch fish on the reg. Obviously a spidernado is now inevitable.

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Newly Discovered Desert Spider Literally Cartwheels Away From Danger

Can he swing from a web? WHO CARES? He's doing backflips!

You know how in some action movie sequences, the protagonist somersaults away from their assailant's attacks to show off how strong and agile they are, even though they could have just run away and it might have been faster? Apparently that's not just a stunt gimmick: it happens in nature, too.

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“Spiderless” Arachnophobia Therapy Has Way More Rolling Chairs, Fewer Spiders

Great, now I have to find someone to pick this chair up and take it outside.

If you're a chronic arachnophobic who's avoided seeking treatment because you dread the brutality of exposure therapy, it may be possible to cure your fear without meeting millions of creepy crawlies -- but you'll never see tripods the same way again.

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Prepare Your Webshooters, Spider Silk Finally Ready for Commercial Production

I wonder if the genetically modified bacteria shoot the webs out of their wrists...

Like just about everyone, you've dreamed of swinging around like Spider-Man on your own webs while trying desperately not to think about how creepy that is. Well, now you... still probably shouldn't, because you don't have any super powers to help you out with it, but spider web may soon be a commercial material, so you're welcome to try.

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Man Gets Hideous Spider Tattoo On His Face To Overcome His Arachnophobia

Because that's how psychology works, I guess?

Like many of us--myself included--Eric Rico Ortiz is scared of spiders. Luckily, the 24 year old from Florida (shocker) devised an innovative way to force himself to overcome the common phobia: by getting a massive black widow tattooed on his right cheek.

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A Black Hole-Powered Quasar Is Showing Astronomers That the Universe Is Pretty Gassy

Turns out the universe owes everyone a big "excuse me."

Computer simulations have previously shown astronomers that the universe was, well, pretty gassy, but they're just now getting their first glimpse of the universe's gas, and they didn't even have to hold a match up in front of its butt to do so. While that's mildly disappointing, a black hole-powered quasar lighting it up is still pretty cool.

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Male Black Widows Must Dance For Their Mates To Remind Them They’re Not Food

It's hard when you have eight left feet.

If you thought your relationship was grim, a recent study published in Frontiers of Zoology posits that male Black Widows must thrust their ''pelvises" repeatedly to remind their eight-legged mates not to eat them.

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Spider-Man’s Web Slingshot Maneuver Is Used by Real Spiders to Catch Prey, It Seems Way Less Silly Now

Stan Lee is a scientific pioneer.

He does everything a spider can! Not to be outdone, spiders can do almost everything a Spider-Man can—including slingshotting themselves by stretching their webs way back. Don't worry; the ones who do this are pretty small and not too scary... for being spiders. To bugs and especially mosquitos, though, they're flying balls of webbed death.

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Monday Cute: Peacock Spiders Really Good at the YMCA

Awwwwww

Well, okay they're really good at the 'Y' part. They're working on the rest. Give them some time, they're just teeny little guys. Previously in Monday Cute

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These Itsy-Bitsy Spiders Are Not What They Appear…

Don't Panic

Don't worry, those aren't real spiders-- they're the embroidery of artist Catherine Rosselle. They look pretty real, though! Rosselle embroiders creepy crawlies so real you'll be breaking out the bug spray. Want to see some more? Head under the cut!

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Make It Count, Dude: Spider Species Dies After Having Sex

Male dark fishing spiders have just one roll in the hay in them. After mating, the arachnids immediately curl up and die.

I know the human dating game can seem rough at times, but the fact of the matter is, we have it pretty good. Don't believe me? Consider if you will the sorry state of Dolomedes tenebrosus, the dark fishing spider. A recent study of the spiders, common around the American midwest, found that males of the species get a grand total of one shot at breeding -- immediately after copulation, their work on this Earth done, the creatures promptly curl up and die.

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Sanctuary for Giant Pandas Also Home to Newly Discovered Tiny Spiders

These tiny spiders prove that no matter how small a spider is, they're really freaky looking up close.

One of the great things about setting aside land as a sanctuary for one creature is that it helps to preserve a whole ecosystem full of plants and animals -- some of which we may not even know exist yet. Take for example the two new species of spider -- both among the world's tiniest -- that were just discovered on the grounds of a panda sanctuary in southwest China. One of these little guys averages less than a millimeter across. You could eat, like, 50 of them in your sleep and never even know it!

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