It Seems That NASA Has Drawn a Giant Penis on the Surface of Mars
We love photos from space as much as the next guy, but there are some pictures we probably never need to see. Like when one of NASA’s Mars rovers leaves a distinctly phallic line of tracks in the dirt, inscribing what looks for all the world like the sort of crude drawing of a penis you can see on men’s room walls the world over on the face of another planet.
This right here, folks? This is why humans don’t get invited to nicer planets. It appears that as a species, we literally can’t go anyplace in the universe without scribbling a picture of a dick on the wall. I just hope pictures of the “For a good time call Marion Aldrin” message that Neal Armstrong left on the moon never come to light. I’m not sure we could take the embarrassment as a species.
Sure, this could be Photoshopped, but as it was found on an official NASA page, that’s pretty doubtful. Drawing a penis on another planet is not the sort of thing NASA would joke about. Okay, I take that back — drawing a penis on another planet is probably exactly the sort of thing NASA employees joke about, but we still have a hard time believing this is anything but a coincidence. A hilarious, hilarious coincidence.
Rovers like Opportunity — which apparently left these tracks — often had to make a series of tight turns in their efforts to find better paths across the dusty surface of Mars, resulting in circles, which, when left next to a long set of straight tracks at an alignment that’s just so can look a lot like…well, you know.
We’re hoping against hope that this was an accident, because it’s actually way, way funnier as an accident, as vandalizing another planet is pretty not cool. We’re not even done vandalizing Earth yet! Accident or not, one thing is for sure: The alien civilizations judging humanity’s readiness to journey further into the stars just released a heavy sigh and got out their red pens.