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A Series of Fallopian Tubes

Uteri of the Internet Unite! Women Leave “Vagina Updates” on Virginia State Senator’s Facebook Page

Good afternoon, Mary Sue readers! Meet Virginia State Senator Ryan McDougle! He is one of the state lawmakers who has come out to ardently support the state’s mandatory transvaginal ultrasound bill, almost as if he had no idea what was really entailed in women’s health decisions that are usually made by women. He is pictured above speaking with some of his constituents, and he invites other constituents to visit him on his Facebook page! Some of them have, and they have some questions that concern their vaginas, ovaries, and uteri they have felt compelled to share with him, what with his sudden interest in the reproductive goings-on of strangers! Want to come take a look? There are screenshots!

Prompted by just one of the disturbingly numerous state-sponsored bills that require women to jump through a variety of “shaming hoops” before getting a (federally-legal and medically-safe) abortion, women have started flooding the Facebook page of Sen. McDougle with updates about the daily activities of their lady business. Graphic updates. Well, you know, since he’s volunteered himself to be so involved in making health decisions for women, they had every logical reason to seek him out. For advice! The comments have been, predictably, deleted from the page — but not before screenshots were captured:

That’s not even the half of it. More screenshots were recovered by Daily Kos, but just in case you’re reading this on something that has trouble with graphics, here is the text of some of the comments:

“Hey, since you’re so interested in my health, I just wanted to let you know that I’ve been really horny lately because I’m ovulating. But don’t worry; I won’t engage in dangerous heterosexual sex that could result in a pregnancy. This is because I’m a really fat and hairy Lesbian and I plan on having sex with women for the rest of my life, the really butchy dykey kind. The current object of my affections, and central character in the majority of the sexual fantasies at the moment, is Alison Bechdel (pictured below). Thanks for showing me the light in regards to my own sexual health, in affirming that having sex with men in more trouble than it’s worth. The fact that women are sexier anyway, it just a happy coincidence.”

“Hello Senator. My daughter is still young, but will one day be a woman, and before I know it she’ll be having her ‘curse,’ if ya know what I mean… it’s not easy for kids, especially females, to have to deal with this fact of life. I don’t raise my kids to be Christian, even though some of my best friends are, and they have family in Thailand, so essentially they’re half Buddhist. My question to you is, is religion aside, what should she expect from a government here in the U.S. that wants to probe her vagina? How do I explain to her the whole ‘good touch, bad touch’ thing when politicians think it’s acceptable to explore vaginas with plastic instruments? Also, is this part of a plan to create jobs somehow?”

“I am so excited that you’ve taken such an interest in my health. I just wanted to know your thought on a possible yeast infection, I can’t afford health insurance even with my three jobs, so since you’re so tuned into womens bodies, I thought you might have some natural remedies…let me know!”

“Dear Senator McDougle,
I am writing this with great urgency. As I am typing this, my girlfriend is suffering an allergic reaction to her tampon. If this word makes you uncomfortable I will use the word sanitation pad. You are concerned about women’s health and I would like to learn the best alternative to sanitation pads? There is currently a threat of vaginal bleeding in my car. I do not want [this] to happen not because of the damages to the interior of my car but if I am pulled over by a male police officer for my own safety, the stains will make him feel uncomfortable because he must acknowledge the [existence] of women’s health.”

“Senator McDougle, I am almost 49 and STILL menstruating with no sign of slowing down! Frankly, I’ve had enough of this inconvenience- the cost of pads and pain reliever and all the mess- well YOU know how it is. You’re an expert on this lady stuff. I was going to ask my gynocologist [sic] about this issue, but since you know so much about women’s reproductive health, I figured I’d just stop by your Facebook page and ask you. So, when will I finally go through the change? My mister and I want to donate the money we spend on birth control to the Richmond Reproductive Freedom Project to help women pay for those unfunded government mandated ultrasounds.”

“You know, Senator, I’ve wished all my life that a man would know more about my own vaginal issues than I do, and now you’re here! So here it goes, during my last period, I had to use the Super tampons because I had some chunky blood issues. You know, that pesky uterus and all. Maybe you could tell my uterus that all the blood will ooze out in its own time, and not to rush itself into shooting clots out every month. Also, I find it very inconvenient that I wake up in a pool of my own blood on the first and second days of my period. Maybe you can help a sister out?”

“hey… mister… i think i might be havin’ my first period, but i dunno what to do… help?”

Well, you know, you get the idea. I had actually proposed this to the rest of the staff of The Mary Sue, so I think this is a fantastic idea. If these lawmakers really, really, really want to make this an issue, then they deserve to know the full story about what they are trying to write laws about. I know, lawmakers on every level of the government rarely read the full text of the legislation for which they cast votes. But the good thing about women’s health is that there are tons of women who can talk about their health in uncomplicated terms, as we have just seen. And if the issue is uncomfortable for these lawmakers, or if they feel like they just don’t or can’t fully understand it, then maybe they will back away from trying to force women to do things like undergo invasive procedures.

But probably not.

By the way, for anyone who might see these posts as harassment against Sen. McDougle, allow us to point out the following: There was no name-calling, no personal attacks on the senator, and no threats of violence. And that’s a lot more than what can be said for attacks we’ve seen on people representing the other side of the argument.

(Daily Kos via Jezebel)

Previously in Women’s Health

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  • Victoria Eden

    This is… Beautiful.

  • Corina Lynn Becker

    dang it, we can no longer post on his wall…. I wanted to join in too!!!!  If he’s really interested in women’s health, I have many many bloody details to share with him!!!  What? He talks the talk but doesn’t walk the walk?  hmph!!!

    Ahem, anyways.  Gotta love it when we can get back, even a little.  Can I hope that maybe he’s smarten up, or is that pushing it too far?

  • Miss Silver

    Hahahahaha. Oh, I love this. And now if only someone could get a picture of the shades of red his face turns when he reads these…

  • Anonymous
  • Rebecca P.

    I LOVE this so much. Honestly, we should do this on the walls of every politician…

  • John Wao

    Brilliant as a cowboy hat.

  • Terence Ng

    Amazing. Now that his Facebook profile is rejecting his calling to provide his expertise on women’s health, we have no other choice but to seek his help via his website or through a letter writing campaign.

  • Anna B

    This is the absolute best thing I’ve read all day.

  • Karen Krajenbrink

    It’s okay guys…  his email is still readily available:

  • Anonymous

    Yes.  Their office walls.

    (so they can’t just delete it all)

  • Jama Watts

    This absolutely made my day.

  • Maddie Drake


  • Lisa Jonte

    Ah, I love it when the Interwebz uses it’s power for good.

  • Teresa Goodell

    Try again. I just did. You can’t read the previous comments, but I’m betting the good senator can. 

  • Kelly Erin Cavanaugh

    I really hope people flood his emails, too!!

  • lunakatrina

    I just sent him an email, I was so sad I missed out on the facebook fun I couldn’t resist XD

  • Anonymous

    Send Pretty Picture Post Cards with Your Message in Sharpie Pen. Post Cards go straight through to the ‘Great Man’ instead of being opened, fondled & censored by his staff first & Everybody along the way gets to read it, too. This works for all ‘Great Men’ (& the few ‘Great Wemyn’ left) in High Positions. In fact, their staff often let such Post Cards pass unread. It’s a Pretty Picture Post Card after all. How ‘dangerous’ could it be? It’s a good way to get your message right on that ‘Great Desk’. Enjoy! & Pass it on….  *’)

  • Anonymous

    These impotent dirty old white men are so getting off on the very idea of “vaginal probes”, don’t think they aren’t…especially since their own vaginal probes no longer work, if they ever did. I think they should definitely be given rectal probes before every Viagra refill. For ‘health reasons’, of course, to make sure their prostates are ok. Though these closet queens probably secretly get off on that, too. The word “Pervert” just keeps coming to mind.  };p…ugh! 

  • Bryn Jackson

    You can post on his wall.  Go to the left side where it says “Events” and it will take you different things he posted.  You can leave messages there.

  • Johanna Hatch

    Here’e his e-mail:
    And his legislative aide:

  • Anonymous

    Oh, there are more we can share our lady business with…here is a link to all VA State Senators. Typing this as I look out upon the capitol steps from my office….lovely day to update and educate! 

    And here is how it went down…

  • EstherL

    It’s too bad that none of these women with exceptional rhetoric & speaking abilities are using their voice for the life of the unborn: the womb is the most dangerous place to be in America. Don’t they realize that abortion is a much more painful & invasive vaginal procedure than a transvaginal ultrasound? Not to mention the psychological & emotional trauma & guilt which comes afterward. I thank Senator Ryan McDougle for truly caring about women.

  • Flame Bridesdottir

    I tweeted him.

  • Flame Bridesdottir

    Hey there Esther: Abortions are performed with general and/or local anaesthesia. Little to no pain involved. Certainly nowhere near the pain of childbirth, or the pain of carrying your rapist’s baby, or the pain of know that you are a second class citizen whose own sisters are undermining her. The only guilt I carry is in not speaking up sooner. *mutters twat under her breath and clicks a different link*

  • Anonymous

    When people lament how getting aborted is so painful and whatnot, I always think of the Tudor-era people who said getting beheaded in one fatal swoop was painless. I’m always like, ‘HOW DO YOU KNOW!? WERE YOU BEHEADED OR ABORTED EVER IN LIFE?’ XD But in all seriousness Esther, I’m glad you’re in favor of men telling women what they can and can’t do with their bodies. Yay Stockholm syndrome!

    Oh, I forgot, the whole point of women (and some funny men) mocking a man who claims to be more educated about LADYPARTS than actual LADIES is lost on you. Just like all other forms of sarcasm. Now go concern troll on a GOP blog, please.

  • Anonymous

    Lots of these women are using their exceptional rhetoric and speaking skills to advocate for better sexual education and birth control options which would prevent millions of unwanted pregnancies and therefore millions of abortions. I think it’s a shame that those who profess to consider abortion murder are fighting against policies that would prevent millions of murders. The conclusion I come to is it’s just a culture war and not a concern over human life.

    in short:
    more options = less abortions
    there’s still room on the bandwagon

  • Emily Hill

    What a Jack wagon I don’t want the government doing a gynecologist job pervs

  • Heather Hahn

    Seems he doesn’t have any “Events” now either…. and I so wanted to ask him how I should go about treating my debilitating back pain I get during my period. I know he’ll know the answer. Who can I ask now??

  • Christine Mooers  Gov. McDonnell has a FB page too…

  • Anonymous

    The “help a sister out!” killed me. Bravo, ladies. I’m so proud my gender can provide such cans of whoop-ass, confidence and overall badassery…and in lovely, friendly rhetoric, too!

  • Michal Bennett

     Dearest Esther    Are you old enough to remember the botched abortions that prompted us Americans to legalize abortion?  If you truly care about women then research this subject and look at the doucmentary reality check tv program “”Toughest place to be…” a midwife”. You will see a womens health system that is what criminalizing abortion will create. A young woman (who cares why or how she is pregnant) puts herbs into her cervix to abort her pregnancy and DIES a horribly painful prolonged death. Why are we fighting each other when if we got together we could prevent misery around the world. Making it harder to get an abortion will only lead to women taking medical procedures to the back alleys again.

  • Fran

    You can post – just share his post and comment away.  He can’t delete the share – or your comments.

  • Fran

    Actually, you can comment via share.

  • Fran

    YES.  This.  I like to send postcards via premiumpostcards – you just upload a front picture and a back picture, and give them the address.  They postmark and mail.  Cheap way to make a statement.

  • EstherL

    Watch how painful an abortion is to an 11 week old baby here:
    Or ask Gianna Jessen, an abortion survivor, how painful her cerebral palsy is:

  • EstherL

    The struggle isn’t cultural, but spiritual; people have been killing babies since the beginning of time, like burning them in the fires of Baal worship. Abortion is legal now largely because of the sexual revolution of the sixties. More sexual education will not bring morality back to our nation, which is the true answer to this issue. We seek to make abortion irrelevant by true education of all the risks involved, to the women as well as their babies, such as breast cancer:, among several others: Disseminated Intravascular Coagulation, Uterine Rupture, Infection, death and future miscarriages, just to name a few: Those who believe in the sanctity of all life also uphold freedom:
    For two millennia in our Western culture, written into our
    constitutions, specifically protected by our laws, and deeply imprinted into the hearts of
    all men and women, there has existed the absolute value of honoring and protecting the
    right of each human to live. This has been an unalienable and unequivocal right. The only
    exception has been that of balancing a life for a life in certain situations or by due
    process of law. Never, in modern times — except by a small group of physicians
    in Hitler’s Germany and by Stalin in Russia — has a price tag of economic or
    social use-fullness been placed on an individual human life as the price of its continued
    Never, in modern times — except by physicians in Hitler’s
    Germany — has a certain physical perfection been required as a condition necessary
    for the continuation of that life.
    Never — since the law of paterfamilias in ancient Rome —
    has a major nation granted to a father or mother total dominion over the life or death of
    their child.
    Never, in modern times, has the state granted to one citizen the
    absolute legal right to have another killed in order to solve their own personal, social
    or economic problem. And yet, if this is human life, the U.S. Supreme
    Court Decision in America and permissive abortion laws in other
    nations do all of the above. They represent a complete about-face, a total rejection of
    one of the core values of Western man, and an acceptance of a new ethic in which life has
    only a relative value. No longer will every human have a right to live simply because he
    or she exists. A human will now be allowed to exist only if he measures up to certain
    standards of independence, physical perfection, or utilitarian usefulness to others. This
    is a momentous change that strikes at the root of Western civilization. It makes no
    difference to vaguely assume that human life is more human post-born than pre-born. What
    is critical is to judge it to be — or not to be — human life. By a measure of
    “more” or “less” human, one can easily and logically justify
    infanticide and euthanasia. By the measure of economic and/or social usefulness, the
    ghastly atrocities of Hitlerian mass murders came to be. One cannot help but be reminded
    of the anguished comment of a condemned Nazi judge, who said to an American judge after
    the Nuremberg trials, “I never knew it would come to this.” The American judge
    answered simply, “It came to this the first time you condemned an innocent

  • EstherL

     Your comment assumes that the only solution to an unwanted pregnancy is to end it, “forcing” the mother to such drastic measures. Adoption is a wonderful alternative; Edgar Allan Poe, Malcolm X, President William Clinton, Tim McGraw & John Lennon, just to name a few from this list, were all adopted: Think of the world without these, if their mothers hadn’t had the courage to choose life? There was a woman who was pregnant, who
    had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis; her Dr advised an abortion, but she refused, thus saving the life of Beethoven. Who are we to play God, deciding who gets to live and who doesn’t? We will have to answer to Him one day, and what will people say then, when there will be no excuses?