Woman says a man told her everything she wanted to hear, then said he was not ready for a relationship: ‘Even though I really don’t want to’
She says the relationship moved fast and he made her feel good, then he told her he was not ready and she cannot stop thinking about him.
A woman says a man she was seeing told her everything she wanted to hear, then told her he was not ready for a relationship. According to Daily Dot, she described the experience in a TikTok video about how hard dating in your 30s can be. She states she cannot stop thinking about him, even though she does not want to.
He told her a relationship was not something he was prepared for, she states. He was also busy with work. She says she chose to walk away, though leaving was hard on her emotionally. Some men give a practical reason for pulling away, as seen with a Hinge match who blamed distance.
She begins the video by asking viewers why the dating scene is so tough once you reach your 30s. She met a man, she says, and the connection built fast. Over the next few months both of them grew attached. Fast starts do not always last, as seen with a Utah woman ghosted after hospital care.
She says she had recently ended a long relationship
He also left her feeling good about herself, she adds, and led her to believe what she hoped was true. She had just come out of a relationship that lasted five and a half years, she says, so she welcomed his company. In her last relationship she felt she gave up a large part of who she was. This time she wanted to protect her self-respect, and she did not want to repeat the pattern.
Memories of the fun they had together keep returning, she says. “Now I’m the one stuck completely thinking about him all the time. Even though I really don’t want to,” she states. All details come from her account in the video and could not be verified independently.
Licensed professional counselor Tina Gilbertson writes in a Psychology Today column on partners who are not ready that readiness is not necessarily a choice. Waiting for a partner to be ready cannot make that person ready, she states. The person who is waiting can decide how long to wait and what to do if readiness never comes.
Gilbertson adds that pressure tends to produce temporary gains unless both people are ready. She also states that resenting the other person is a sign of feeling too little power in the relationship, and she points readers toward what they can control. Pew Research Center has tracked how many single adults are looking for a partner.
Its survey of 6,034 US adults found 42% of single Americans say they are looking for a committed romantic relationship or casual dates. That is down from 49% in 2019. Among single adults under 50, 57% say they are looking, compared with 36% of those ages 50 to 64 and 16% of those 65 and older. Adults ages 30 to 49 are the least likely age group to be single, at 21%. By gender, 50% of single men and 35% of single women say they are looking. For men, that is down from 61% in 2019. For women, the 2019 figure was 38%.
The survey’s online dating findings add more detail. Three in ten US adults say they have ever used a dating site or app, and the share rises to 37% among ages 30 to 49. Among users, 53% describe their experience as very or somewhat positive and 46% as very or somewhat negative.
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