What would you do if you were the richest person on Earth? Would you fund cancer research in the hopes of finding a cure? Would you singlehandedly end world hunger? Would you build schools and universities that are free for anyone to attend? Or would you fight other billionaires in some weird rich boy fight club flex? If you’re Mark Zuckerberg and Elon Musk, the answer is obvious. It’s pale man fight club, baby!
Elon Musk, Twitter owner and Kirkland Signature Tony Stark, instigated the tech bro takedown against Facebook/Meta founder Zuckerberg via Twitter (where else?). Musk mocked Zuckerberg for introducing a new Instagram feature, Threads, that mimics Twitter. “I’m sure Earth can’t wait to be exclusively under Zuck’s thumb with no other options,” Musk tweeted. He then joked that he would be “up for a cage match” with Zuckerberg.
Zuckerberg then posted the above exchange on Instagram Stories with the caption “Send me location”. And in case you thought he was joking, The Verge confirmed with Meta spokesperson Iska Saric, who said “The story speaks for itself.” In response, Musk tweeted “Vegas Octagon”, followed by “I have this great move that I call ‘The Walrus’, where I just lie on top of my opponent & do nothing”. He later tweeted, “if this is for real, I will do it”.
The fiery exchange has people wondering who would win this pissing contest between the two tech titans, although is there really a winner here? Sure, Zuck has entered the “extreme athlete” stage of being a billionaire, competing in Brazilian jiu-jitsu competitions in Silicon Valley high school gyms. Up next in the pipeline: intermittent fasting and space exploration! Meanwhile, Musk has bragged about street-fighting on the streets of South Africa in his youth (Sure Jan), and has previously challenged actor Johnny Depp to a cage match over Amber Heard.
Of course, it doesn’t matter who wins this ridiculous whiny boy slap fight. The real loser is humanity, which is plagued by oblivious billionaires who would rather wrestle one another for clicks instead of effecting real, global change with their fortunes. These men have the biggest platform in the world, but they’d rather air their insecurities and fight like children. Tax the rich already.
(via The Verge, featured image: Chip Somodevilla / Chesnot, Getty Images / Illustration by The Mary Sue)
