Stephen Colbert Performs a Very Serious Investigation of Trump’s Russian Hotel Room—Yeah, THAT One

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Stephen Colbert is wrapping up his “Russia week” as the investigation into the Trump campaign’s possible collusion with the Russian government continues, and there’s one allegation in particular that Colbert is interested in: the pee tape. So, he went to the room where it all supposedly went down.

The important parts of the “Steele Dossier” of allegations against Donald Trump—and well beyond, at this point—are in the hands of capable investigators who hopefully won’t get fired anytime soon, but what of the assertion that Trump once hired prostitutes to pee on a bed as a sign of disrespect to Barack and Michelle Obama, who had once occupied it in the Russian hotel?

Trump has denied it, explaining that he’s a “germaphobe” (although no one ever said he’d actively participated in the…festivities directly), and that he’s well aware that he should expect hotel rooms to be bugged—very comforting for Trump hotel guests! In the segment, Colbert made a cursory show of looking for bugs, which are pretty much certainly there despite coming up empty.

He also spoke to Andrei Soldatov, a Russian journalist who’s been critical of the Russian government’s surveillance policies, who was understandably shy about even admitting that he’d heard the details of what Colbert was there to talk about. Journalists who run afoul of Russian President Vladimir Putin have a history of some extremely bad luck, to say the least.

Regardless, we’re all pretty sure that Donald Trump was under surveillance whenever he was in Russia—the question is whether or not that surveillance turned up anything useful, which is hard to figure out when the whole point of blackmail is to keep it secret and hold it over someone’s head. Luckily, we have only the most qualified TV comedians on the case.

(image: CBS)

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Dan Van Winkle
Dan Van Winkle (he) is an editor and manager who has been working in digital media since 2013, first at now-defunct Geekosystem (RIP), and then at The Mary Sue starting in 2014, specializing in gaming, science, and technology. Outside of his professional experience, he has been active in video game modding and development as a hobby for many years. He lives in North Carolina with Lisa Brown (his wife) and Liz Lemon (their dog), both of whom are the best, and you will regret challenging him at Smash Bros.