10 best self-help books, ranked

As I have spent a good part of the last year in and out of hospitals, ICUs, trauma treatment centers, and eating disorder treatment, I feel like I have read almost every self-help book under the sun. Once my doctors and therapists caught wind of my love of reading—which wasn’t hard since I always had at least three physical books on me—they would immediately assign me take-home reading.

Some of these self-help books were boring beyond belief. Others were as engrossing as the latest Stephen King novel. Although some of the most boring books are considered classics in the therapy/medical trade, I won’t bother you with those, as they require reading in a particular headspace, a.k.a. a healthy one.

I’ve tried to include the whole gamut of self-help books here, along with a workbook suggestion for each, all of which can be purchased or are available through your local library and/or the Libby app.

1. A Body Made of Glass: A Cultural History of Hypochondria by Caroline Crampton

Penned by cancer survivor and hypochondriac Caroline Crampton, A Body Made of Glass is a complete cultural history of hypochondria, now classified by the DSM-V as illness anxiety disorder (though, importantly, the old term now also includes a few other mental health diagnoses that were reclassified to make diagnostic criteria easier). In it, Crampton explores the history of hypochondriasis, how it’s more often diagnosed in those with uteruses, the sociocultural impact of that legacy, and how she’s grappled with what her illness anxiety disorder diagnosis means to her as a two-time cancer survivor. 

As there is still debate over the inclusion of illness anxiety in the DSM-V, this history couldn’t have arrived at a better time. Some researchers argue that the disorder erases the experiences of those with chronic illness, pathologizing people with physical conditions that the medical community has not widely accepted (sometimes, even when there are medical markers to determine a disease’s existence). Since the medical community’s lack of knowledge about specific diagnoses can lead patients to seek mental health care, even when they have an underlying condition that needs to be treated, this first-person account is helpful for anyone feeling gaslighted by the medical system.

Workbook: The ACT Workbook for OCD: Mindfulness, Acceptance, and Exposure Skills to Live Well with Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder by Marisa T. Mazza, PsyD 

2. Breathe: Journeys to Healthy Binding by Maia Kobabe and Sarah Peitzmeier, PhD

Breathe is an essential resource for any person who’s considering binding. It’s an illustrated resource that covers research about the impact of binding by Sarah Peitzmeier, PhD and includes workbook pages for figuring out what trans individuals want from their gender-affirming care.

Book: Trans Bodies, Trans Selves: A Resource by and for Transgender Communities by  Laura Erickson-Schroth

3. Accessing the Healing Power of the Vagus Nerve: Self-Help Exercises for Anxiety, Depression, Trauma, and Autism by Stanley Rosenberg

Based on the groundbreaking work of Stephen Porges, PhD, who developed the Polyvagal Theory, Stanley Rosenberg has created a resource accessible to the layperson. Certain psychological conditions, medical diseases, and traumatic events rewire the body’s nervous system, keeping your autonomic nervous system in a constant state of fight-or-flight. The resource teaches readers how to get their nervous systems out of self-protection mode with helpful exercises. 

Thanks to my ex-boyfriend running me over with a car, years of medical gaslighting, and my belief that trauma like that was just something you must learn to live with (of note: it’s not; posttraumatic stress disorder is a beast that requires specialized help ASAP), my flight-or-fight system turns me into a scared porcupine (thank for the analogy Rosenberg!) where I end up in a ball with my quills out. It’s hard to work on yourself when your nervous system is stuck in fear-and-defense mode. However, this book (plus working through it with a therapist at the trauma treatment center) changed my life. It laid the foundation for a calmer nervous system that wasn’t so resistant to the trials and tribulations of life, and most importantly, it set my mind and body up to start down the path toward healing.

Workbook: Polyvagal Card Deck: 58 Practices for Calm and Change by Deb Dana

4. Somatic Internal Family Systems Therapy: Awareness, Breath, Resonance, Movement, and Touch in Practice by Susan McConnell

Internal Family Systems, or IFS, is a modality created by Dr. Richard Schwartz to treat his patients with eating disorders. However, now, the modality is more broadly applied to any mental health condition that can cause a fracturing of the self. In the theory, each of these selves (known as parts) is labeled as our managers, protectors, or exiles, all of which serve to protect us in times of need but can also separate us from our core identities. Although on its face, a fractured self may seem like a bad thing, it’s not. It’s how our system has learned to protect itself from trauma and stress. 

Although Somatic Internal Family Systems is a resource for therapists, I vastly preferred it to the patient-oriented sources from Schwartz because it was more inclusive. In it, you will learn about the modality and how to use it to tell when your bad part is making a decision instead of your core self. Significantly, it will help you accept these parts and the decisions they’ve made because “THERE ARE NO BAD PARTS.”

Workbook: The Somatic Internal Family Systems Therapy Workbook: Embodied Healing Practices to Transform Trauma by Susan McConnell

5. Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker

The concept of complex posttraumatic stress disorder, or CPTSD, was introduced shortly after the APA officially recognized PTSD to reflect the differences in the psychological impact and sequelae of trauma in those who have experienced prolonged, interpersonal trauma versus those who have gone through a single-event trauma. Researchers in the field argue that for those who have CPTSD, their experiences need to be understood beyond PTSD’s intrusive symptoms, avoidance, and hyperarousal.

For a good reason, Pete Walker is practically a god in the CPTSD treatment world. If you want (dare I say need?) to understand how adverse childhood experiences, domestic violence, and even prolonged medical trauma have impacted how you function in this world, Walker’s book on CPTSD is a quintessential resource. What it did for me was life-changing, as it taught me how to identify when the symptoms of CPTSD were about to rear their ugly GIANT heads. This has dramatically reduced the number of dissociative amnesia episodes and flashbacks that I experience weekly and significantly increased the amount of time I’m mindfully aware of the world around me. Helping me along my road to recovery was also Walker’s other book, The Tao of Fully Feeling: Harvesting Forgiveness Out of Blame.

Workbook: The Complex PTSD Workbook: A Mind-Body Approach to Regaining Emotional Control and Becoming Whole by Arielle Schwartz, PhD

6. The Third Person by Emma Grove

Emma Grove’s The Third Person is a moving graphic memoir about her experience as a trans woman with dissociative identity disorder. I’ve read Grove’s memoir twice, before and after my diagnosis with dissociative disorders. Something that didn’t hit the first time, when I was reading it to learn more about the trans experience in therapy than the barriers of DID to gender-affirming care, is that several related disorders meet the dissociative criteria. Unfortunately for the little superhero inside my soul, we are not all like Moon Knight, though the Disney+ series was popular among my treatment cohort. 

I gifted Grove’s memoir to a friend I made at the trauma treatment center who wasn’t a huge graphic novel fan, and she devoured 900+ pages overnight (note to others considering intensive help: I learned this is not an acceptable practice in treatment). What sparked her interest, as well as my decision to do a second read-through, was how hard it can be to feel validated about one’s own dissociative experiences when treated by an American mental health professional. This memoir allowed us to find solace in the experiences of others, which, in my humble opinion, is the power of the memoir.

Workbook: Somatic Therapy Workbook Exercises to Treat Trauma, Complex PTSD and Dissociation: Mindfulness, Self-Compassion, and the Mind-Body Approach to Reduce Stress and Heal Trauma by Yevhenii Lozovy

7. Reclaiming Body Trust: Break Free from a Culture of Body Perfection, Disordered Eating, and Other Traumas by Hilary Kinavey, MS LPC and Dana Sturtevant, MS RD

We live in a world that seems obsessed with what’s on the outside, not the inside. It’s popular wisdom, often misguidedly promoted by ill-informed doctors, that one’s well-being, health, willpower, and morality can all be deemed by looking at someone’s body. However, that’s not true, as the current research working to decolonize the wellness industry has demonstrated that thinness isn’t a predictor of health. Instead, it’s a beauty standard put forth by a medical industry shaped by cis white men who want insurance companies to cover procedures that turn women into objects for the male gaze.

Body Trust attempts to dismantle the systems promoting weight stigma such as racism, sexism, classicism, homophobia, ableism, and healthism (“the idea that a person’s health is entirely their responsibility,” thus, placing “a moral importance on maintaining good health”), and nutritionism (“a paradigm that assumes that it is the scientifically identified nutrients in foods that determine the value of individual foodstuffs in the diet”). By doing our best to divest from these systems and diet culture—the book acknowledges that’s not always possible—we can repair our relationships with our bodies by learning to trust our appetites, longing, and hunger.

Workbook: The Art of Body Acceptance: Strengthen Your Relationship with Yourself Through Therapeutic Creative Exercises by Ashlee Bennett

8. Self-Compassion: The Proven Power of Being Kind to Yourself by Dr. Kristin Neff

Kristin Neff’s groundbreaking research on the Buddhist construct of self-compassion has revolutionized therapy, with well over 5000 studies on self-compassion conducted by various scholars since she first published her self-compassion theory in 2003. What all this research has shown is that across a wide variety of mental health diagnoses, self-compassion work can be life-changing. But it’s not only those who struggle with mental health that can be changed by finding compassion for their shortcomings; it’s anyone who needs help with their motivation. 

Workbook: The Mindful Self-Compassion Workbook: A Proven Way to Accept Yourself, Build Inner Strength, and Thrive by Kristin Neff, PhD, and Christopher Germer, PhD

9. Processing: 100 Comics That Got Me Through It by Tara Booth

Publisher Drawn and Quarterly sent me a copy of Tara Booth’s slice-of-life work about the trauma of living in a body that bleeds while I was in treatment. When it arrived, it was so popular with my roommates at the women’s trauma center that it lived on the dining room table. The slice-of-life work had a little something for everyone, providing community to those of us grasping for any thread of shared humanity beyond the cozy confines of treatment.

Workbook: Draw Stronger: Self-Care For Cartoonists and Other Visual Artists by Kriota Willberg

10. Essential Art Therapy Exercises: Effective Techniques to Manage Anxiety, Depression, and PTSD by Leah Guzman, ATR-BC

Art therapy accesses parts of the brain that traditional talk therapy can’t access, per Vija B. Lusebrink. As I have seen, many people initially refuse to engage in art therapy at the hospital, and in treatment, it’s not about making “good” art. It’s about creating “expressive” art to help you unlock the side of the brain that stores traumatic memories. While some art therapy books can be triggering to do on your own, I found the exercises in Leah Guzman’s book accessible.

More art therapy (’nuff said): Art Therapy Sourcebook by Cathy A. Malchiodi