The Bacon Coffin, For Those Who Love Bacon to Death
In what may be an early April Fool’s gag comes the ultimate bacon-related purchase: The bacon coffin. Sadly not made from actual bacon, this painted 18-gauge steel coffin comes from J&D’s — the makers of baconaise, bacon salt, and the legendary BaconAir. According to the founders of the company, which apparently consider themselves “Bacontrepreneurs,” this is the perfect item for someone who loves bacon to death.
On the product’s website and corresponding video from Seattle Insider, the bacon coffin is a luxury coffin with all the amenities one would expect in a high quality corpse box. The casket is for “sale” now for a mere $2,999.99, and even comes with a bacon air freshner. That way, grave robbers will not just see your dedication to pork products; they’ll smell it, too.
It’s worth noting that while the BaconAir gag from last year is listed as “out of stock,” this handsome casket is listed as “in stock.”
However, for those truly dedicated to the salted fatty pork strips, some might prefer an even more intimate bacon burial than simply being encased in a metal box with a pink camouflage paint job. May I recommend a more eco-friendly and natural burial method? How about bacon mummification, in which the corpse is stuffed with bacon and then wrapped in strips of bacon.