10 Greatest Hot Mess Characters in TV History

Euphoria‘s third season is a mess, and not in a hot way. With baffling character arcs, uncomfortable dialogue, and a voyeuristic obsession with human suffering, the show went from being a compelling drama about flawed people to a complete narrative dumpster fire. While pop culture will always have a soft spot for beautiful protagonists who make increasingly poor decisions, some TV shows manage to control the chaos to make a greater thematic point. Whether they’re gearing up for a redemption arc or spiraling towards rock bottom, these unhinged heroes are some of the best. Clean up on aisle 3; these are the 10 greatest hot mess characters in TV history.

Prince Zuko

A literal hot mess, Zuko is the flame-shooting prince of the Fire Nation, exiled from his homeland years before Avatar: The Last Airbender‘s first episode. While sailing the seas searching fruitlessly for the Avatar, Zuko’s airbending target becomes the personification of his hopes and shame. The dictionary definition of “daddy issues,” Zuko intends to capture Avatar Aang to restore his honor in his father’s eyes. While wise men like his Uncle Iroh know that nothing this banished prince ever does will be enough for Fire Lord Ozai, Zuko keeps on trying. He spends season one relentlessly chasing Aang and friends across the world, burning down anyone and anything standing in his way. When all hope of redemption is lost by season two, Zuko spirals even further. He picks fights, robs people, and abandons Iroh — the only person who cares about him — more times than Sokka chucks a boomerang. After years of turmoil, he eventually reconciles his emotions and turns towards good. If it hadn’t been for Iroh, he’d still be chasing his old airbending enemy, but now, he’s saving the world alongside him.

Walter White

Walter Hartwell White may be the hottest hot mess in TV history, a human trash fire with more self-destructive potential than the greatest of Greek tragedy heroes. While he begins Breaking Bad as a mild-mannered high school chemistry teacher, he always had the potential for chaos; his cancer diagnosis just gave him the justification he needed. Walter’s inner sense of unworthiness motivated him to walk away from what became a billion-dollar company, and ever since he’s secretly coveted wealth to make up for what he believes he was denied. He could have contented himself with the hundreds of thousands he and Jesse Pinkman were pulling in from slinging meth, but he wanted to turn those thousands into millions and billions. Robbery, extortion, murder, the money made it all worth it. And instead of keeping a low profile like Gus Fring, he never missed an opportunity to be unhinged. The flashy cars, the piles of cash, the pizza-flinging on the roof; Walter couldn’t keep a lid on it, and it undid him in the end.

Fleabag

One of the greatest self-saboteurs in the history of television, Fleabag can’t hold onto a stable relationship to save her life. Whether it’s with family, friends, or lovers, the titular heroine of Fleabag is completely unable to deal with emotional intimacy. Every moment for self-reflection becomes an opportunity to crack a fourth-wall-breaking joke; every chance she has to tell the truth devolves into more dishonesty. On the surface, she doesn’t seem nearly as bad as other hot messes on this list. She’s clever, perceptive, and strangely self-aware of her behavior. But just because she understands herself doesn’t mean she has the internal fortitude to change herself. She knows she’s wasting her potential to build meaningful relationships on random hookups; she can’t stop herself. And her crush on the hot priest? It’s the perfect irony. She’s so unable to deal with intimacy that she chases the most unavailable person she can find. Just because you can get freaky in the Catholic confessional doesn’t mean you should.

Ice King

Ice King starts Adventure Time as an irredeemable creature of comic relief, a villain so cartoonishly obsessed with capturing princesses that he’s practically a bad guy cliché. Underneath the chilly facade of this royalty-stealing, penguin-parenting, drumkit-mangling ice wizard is the fractured psyche of a once well-adjusted human being. To protect young Marceline from the horrors of a post-apocalyptic world, Simon Petrikov did something no other character on this list could: made the conscious, rational decision to become a hot mess. In exchange for magic power, Simon donned a cursed crown that slowly siphons away his sanity. As the series goes on, Ice King is revealed to be a tragic anti-villain twisted by an impossible choice: lose his loved ones, or his mind. In this case, becoming a hot mess was the most selfless thing he could do.

Lestat de Lioncourt

While every bloodsucker in Interview with A Vampire needs therapy far more than fresh blood, Lestat de Lioncourt wins the award for Most Toxic Creature of the Night. Like any self-respecting vampire, he’s got a sad backstory, full of abuse and torture from the man who turned him. It was this life of violence that led him to say, “I want that one,” when he saw Louis de Pointe du Lac beat up a man in the street, rather than read it as a red flag. A crimson flag flyer himself, Lestat entertains himself via nightly murder — sometimes extremely creative murder, like when he tortured that poor opera singer for every wrong note sung. His other less-than-stellar character traits involve narcissism, emotional abuse, and one very messed-up relationship with his mother. And when I say “relationship,” yes, I do mean it that way. And while Louis may be what he really wants, what he needs is a psychological intervention before he’s ready for love.

Bojack Horseman

The poster horse of hot messes, being a screw-up, is Bojack Horseman’s entire personality. Once a beloved TV dad on the 90s sitcom Horsin’ Around, Bojack Horseman fell into drugs and despair after his career stalled. He’s desperate to make a comeback, but he can’t stay sober long enough to do it. He’s got friends and colleagues who could help him out, but he can’t stop pushing them away. And while showbiz has left him burned out and hopeless, he relentlessly pursues fame, hoping to plug up the hole inside of himself. He’s a trainwreck with mane, a stallion with a substance abuse problem, a courser who knows he’s galloping towards catastrophe, but too horse-headed to change his ways.

Carrie Bradshaw

Upon a rewatch of Sex and the City, it’s clear that Carrie Bradshaw is the chaotic villain. While her high-fashion wardrobe, swanky apartment, and inarguably cool job paint her as the outward portrait of success, she’s one of the least qualified people to advise about intimacy. For a sex writer, she’s one of the most closed-minded characters in the show, constantly criticizing her friends to deflect the conversation away from her own bad decisions. She slut shames Samantha, trashes Charlotte’s idealism, and calls Miranda “judgmental” for calling out her toxic relationship behavior. She cheats on Aiden, her most stable partner to date, with the married Mr. Big — a man she quite literally nicknames after an unattainable romantic ideal she made up in her mind. She’s a hot mess in love, friendship, and finance alike.

Tony Soprano

Despite claiming to be a family man running a respectable business, Tony Soprano is one of the most toxic dads in TV history. His childhood? Total hot mess. Being raised by two narcissists in a mob-ruled neighborhood would do a number on anyone. Tony’s instability stems from being consistently torn between two separate lives. One minute he’s plotting to whack someone with his crew, the next he’s attending his daughter’s high school graduation party. And while he has a dim idea that therapy could help him feel better, he consistently refuses to acknowledge his problems or change his behavior. He could spend the rest of his life worried about nothing but watching ducks in the pool, but he just can’t leave a life of crime behind.

Charlie Kelly

It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia is full of hot messes, but the hot messiest among them is Charlie Kelly. A man who was probably voted Most Unhinged in high school, Charlie behaves less like an adult human and more like three raccoons in a trench coat. His daily ritual consists of chugging a beer, huffing glue, and eating cat food. He’s completely illiterate. He peddles nonsensical conspiracy theories about “Pepe Silvia.” He’s actually kind of an artistic genius. He’s the patron saint of weird little guys everywhere. And while the waitress he can’t stop stalking will never in a million years love him, he luckily has a group of friends who… tolerate him. For a hot mess like Charlie, that’s probably enough.

The Bluth Family

The Bluths are the most dysfunctional family on TV, and I say that knowing full well The Simpsons exist. Arrested Development‘s blood-related anti-heroes are as hot messy at is gets. George Bluth is a disgraced real estate developer wanted for “light treason.” Lucille is a less-than-functioning alcoholic who hates her children. Gob is a failure-to-launch firstborn son with delusions of stage magician grandeur. Lindsay changes her vocation every five minutes. Tobias Fünke is a psychologist turned actor with zero self-awareness about his lack of talent and closeted queerness. Buster is… Buster. And poor Michael Bluth has the one brain cell that this family refuses to share. I’d say George Michael is reasonably well-adjusted if it weren’t for his crush on his cousin, but hey, at least Maeby’s got a good head on her shoulders.

(featured image: HBO)

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