Things We Saw Today: Jedi Michonne Gets a Weapons Upgrade To Fight Zombie Stormtroopers

This poster by PJ McQuade of Michonne, Jedi bounty hunter, is on sale at McQuade's Etsy shop, so that you can contemplate Michonne in all her intimidating, double-lightsaber wielding power and wish there were really a comic book to explain to you how the stormtrooper-zombie outbreak began.

Smuggled Tyrannosaur Skeleton Returned to Its Rightful Home

If you follow the world of fossil hunting, you may remember this story. And if you don't, you might remember it anyway, because there's little that piques the interest of weird news reporters than headlines that include phrases like "dinosaur smugglers." Dinosaurs all over the world can rest easy tonight, knowing that the most complete skeleton of Tyrannosaurus bataar ever found is being shipped back to its place of origin, Mongolia, now that the court case United States of America v. One Tyrannosaurus Bataar Skeleton (actual name) has been settled.

British Batman Goes Rogue, Is Arrested For Burglary

Feel like some news that doesn't involve a chain of human misery that seems to stretch out past the horizon and into the infinite? Yeah, us too. In the interest of that, Batman got arrested for burglary over the weekend. Well, not the real Batman, but Brit Stan Worby, who you may remember as the cape and cowl clad crusader who in February of this year caused a stir by dropping off a suspected criminal at a police station while dressed in full Dark Knight regalia.

Maine Hermit Suspected in More Than 1,000 Burglaries Over 27 Years

Christopher Knight isn't exactly a people person. The 47-year-old Maine man has lived as a hermit in the woods of Maine for nearly 30 years, becoming a sort of local legend. Mr. Knight's latest interaction with other humans isn't likely to get him on board with the idea, either, as he was arrested last week while trying to steal food from a youth camp not far from the humble hovel he calls home. Authorities say it's likely not Knight's first felonious forage, and they suspect him in more than 1,000 burglaries over the years.

Man Tries to Win Back Ex-Wife by Blowing Her Up, Perfects Art of Doing It Wrong

There's an old rule of journalism that states, and I'm paraphrasing, "if a dog bites a man it's not a story, but if a man bites a dog, it is." This proverb may have found it's perfect expression (well, short of a man biting a dog, I guess) in a story coming out of Russia this week: While it is not necessarily a story if a man tries to blow up his ex-wife with a bomb, it's pretty newsworthy if he tries to blow her up with a bomb to win her back. Rarely has an idea on how to do a thing been so perfectly, woefully incorrect.

Guy Who Tried to Sneak Back Into Jail’s Going Back to Jail, Totally Fine With That

36-year-old Matthew Matagrano, pictured above, is a convicted sex offender. That's not what got him in his latest legal trouble, though, as he was arrested last month for impersonating a corrections officer so he could be back in the place he loved the most -- Rikers Island, where he posed as an employee at the jail for at least a week. It looks like Matagrano, who has expressed a desire to return to jail,  will get his wish, as the DA prosecuting his case is seeking to have Matagrano locked up for at least a decade. Sounds like a win-win to us.