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Pens For Women … Thank You?

If we got angry about this kind of thing we'd be angry all the time

Oh, goody goody gumdrops! Someone was thinking of girls when coming up with a new pen! A reader at Jezebel pointed out these new pens by famous pen-maker Bic, which are, as you can see, “For Her” and come in a variety of lovely pastel colors! I wonder if they will automatically dot my “i’s” with full circles or with hearts!

Steve Martin once joked about Virginia Slims being cigarettes “for her,” wondering what made them for women. “Do they have little breasts on them?” he asked. These pens don’t seem to be anatomically different from other pens, unless they’re just simply not curvy. But curvy pens seem like they’d be kind of hard to write with. So, it’s not the shape of the pen.

Is it the size? Are these pens a third of the size of a man’s pen? ::gasp:: Does its ink attract bears?

Maybe they’re magic! Maybe they’ve had a spell put on them by witches to help us write notes in which we apologize for our periods! Or shopping lists! Or entire romance novels with hot pink covers about all the mean, mean men who have scorned us! Can you feel the squeeeee? Pens for us! Pens for US!

Hey! Did you notice that when you take the “I” out of “penis” you have “pens”? That’s a message for us, ladies! To write things! Encouragement!

OMG, ladies, aren’t you glad that Bic thought of us for a change? Because it’s about time someone designed a proper writing implement for us. I am really tired of writing with eyeliner, chocolate, and tears!


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