Oregon Man Arrested After Attacking Toys ‘R’ Us Customers With His Lightsaber

Don't Try This At Home

Recommended Videos

For seemingly no rhyme or reason (or perhaps, sadly, a mental health reason), an unidentified 33-year-old man in Portland, Oregon was arrested after attacking Toys ‘R’ Us shoppers with a blue lightsaber. (Actual lightsaber not pictured above.) After swinging the toy weapon at people inside the store, he exited the store and headed into the parking lot, where cops met him … and where they were then attacked by a lightsaber. The holidays are getting to everyone, they are!

Three people just trying to get their shopping done at nearly 10:00 PM on Wednesday night were the apparent targets of this man’s attack. The police have declined to provide his name or a motive, and the aspiring Jedi is said to be up for a mental evaluation and faces “several criminal charges.”

Basically, after the attack inside the store, one of the shoppers called 911 while the Jedi warrior headed outside, seeing how no one was appreciating his skills. The cops arrived shortly after that, where they were also attacked.

None of the shoppers nor the cops needed medical attention, probably because they were assaulted by a plastic toy and not a real lightsaber. However, that plastic toy successfully deflected tasers aimed at the lightsaber wielder and even rendered them inoperable! (Okay, probably not.)

So, that’s one pepper spray attack, one lightsaber attack … what’s left? Batarangs?

(Oregon Live via Gawker via Blastr)


The Mary Sue is supported by our audience. When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn a small affiliate commission. Learn more
related content
Read Article Here’s Why the ‘L’ Comes First in LGBTQ?
Read Article What Will Conventions Look Like in 2021?
Read Article Dear White People, I Need To Matter Beyond a Thank You
Black Lives Matter protest photo
Read Article Have You Ever Seen a Ghost?
Library of Congress Ghost picture
Read Article Taylor Swift Says She’ll Re-Record All Her Old Albums to Regain Ownership of Them
taylor swift,, voting, tennessee, blackburn, conservatives, vote.org
Related Content
Read Article Here’s Why the ‘L’ Comes First in LGBTQ?
Read Article What Will Conventions Look Like in 2021?
Read Article Dear White People, I Need To Matter Beyond a Thank You
Black Lives Matter protest photo
Read Article Have You Ever Seen a Ghost?
Library of Congress Ghost picture
Read Article Taylor Swift Says She’ll Re-Record All Her Old Albums to Regain Ownership of Them
taylor swift,, voting, tennessee, blackburn, conservatives, vote.org