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Missouri Supreme Court Refuses to Disbar Defense Attorney Who Sexually Assaulted Six Clients

Maybe they’re waiting for a seventh?

The Federal Supreme Court is already on my shit list for overturning Roe v. Wade, and honestly so are Washington Democrats for their tepid response. Looks like I’ve gotta add a state court now.

According to the Kansas City Star (because Kansas City is inexplicably in Missouri) the Missouri Supreme court is refusing to disbar an attorney who has been accused of sexually assaulting six people. And not just “random people” but his own clients. And they have it on VIDEO for God’s sake.

The court voted 4-3 to indefinitely suspend attorney Dan K. Purdy from practicing law, but will allow him to apply for reinstatement next year. Purdy bad decision if you ask me. After all, a disciplinary hearing panel organized over the matter recommended that Purdy be disbarred.

Judge Zel Fischer wrote a scathing dissent to the court’s opinion, saying that there “may have been a time when a temporary suspension was an adequate punishment for sexually assaulting or harassing a client… but that time is long gone”. Not sure if I totally agree with you there Zel, I don’t think there was ever a time when a temporary suspension for sexual assault was an “adequate punishment”, but I like where your head’s at! Good effort!

Meanwhile, the majority leader Judge Draper acknowledged that Purdy had indeed assaulted his clients and criticized him for his conduct, but declined to boot him from law once and for all.

According to reports, Purdy made sexual advances towards four clients while they were being held in a jail interview room. He really failed to read that room. Who in God’s name wants to mack on an 86 year old man while sitting in jail for a crime you haven’t been convicted of? Each woman later confirmed with jail personnel that they had no interest in Purdy’s advances. Doesn’t take Sherlock Holmes to figure that one out. Purdy also groped a client who was in his car, while he was driving. AND SHE RECORDED IT ON HER PHONE. WE HAVE VIDEO OF THIS AND THIS MAN WILL STILL BE ABLE TO PRACTICE LAW.

And that’s not even the worst of it. There is a video from 2021 that shows Purdy grabbing a client’s but WHILE THEY WERE IN COURT. The client submitted an affidavit saying that she believes that he didn’t touch her inappropriately (don’t know how to explain that one) but YOU CAN’T GRAB ASS IN A COURTROOM. EVEN IF IT IS SOMEHOW CONSENSUAL.

Despite this, Draper wrote that Purdy’s suspension is no different from how the court has chosen to handle similar issues in the past. You know, courts once allowed people to beat their wives if the rod was no thicker than their thumb. Maybe we shouldn’t be looking into the past for examples of how to discipline people. Draper also wrote that the discipline was “more severe” than what Purdy had asked for. NO SHIT. I’m sure the “discipline” that Purdy had in mind was spending some time locked in a jail cell with some of his other potential “clients”.

Draper went on to note the most horrible aspect of this situation: that Purdy’s “clients either did not know or did not realize they could repudiate his sexual advances. Purdy fails to grasp the severity of his conduct or these charges.” Oh I think that Purdy grasps it. He’s had a lot practice “grasping” thing lately. He likely used his position as an attorney to pressure already vulnerable women into allowing him to assault them. After all, he was their legal council. Without him, they would have nothing to defend them against the wrath of the court system.

Fischer noted that he was “deeply distressed” by Draper’s decision. Yeah, so are we. He emphasized that the decision was made with regard to Purdy’s age. I guess there’s a “dirty old man forgiveness” clause in the Missouri Supreme Court legislature that we just don’t know about? He also stressed that the Purdy’s assaults had been captured ON VIDEO. AND THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I’M STRESSING TOO.

There’s one silver lining here: Purdy is 86 years old. He has to wait half a year to reapply to practice law, and he may not last that long. Now, I’m not saying we should cross our fingers and hope for an old man to die. You can cross your fingers without talking.

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Jack Doyle (they/them) is actually nine choirs of biblically accurate angels in crammed into one pair of $10 overalls. They have been writing articles for nerds on the internet for less than a year now. They really like anime. Like... REALLY like it. Like you know those annoying little kids that will only eat hotdogs and chicken fingers? They're like that... but with anime. It's starting to get sad.