‘I’m annoyed’: A wife says her sister-in-law booked concert tickets for her husband without asking, and he’s still considering going
Maybe give a bit of warning next time.
Some people love being surprised, and other people hate it. Usually, there’s some kind of middle ground, and it depends on the details of the surprise. For unexpected concert tickets, the important details that make it good or bad would be those like what concert, when, and with whom.
For user No_Fig_6867 on Reddit, surprise concert tickets became a source of annoyance when her sister-in-law bought them for her husband, the sister-in-law’s brother, without asking. As a result, she went to the in-laws subreddit for a reality check.
In a post titled “Older SIL booked concert tickets for her and my husband without asking him first—looking for a reality check and advice,” she provided only basic details about the situation. Her main concern was that she might be overreacting to the situation.
She says it’s part of a pattern
According to the Redditor, her sister-in-law had nobody else to go to the concert with, and that’s why the husband is considering going with his sister despite not being asked. The Redditor’s issue seems to be the lack of communication before buying the tickets.
She called it part of a bigger pattern: “Honestly, I think I’m annoyed because it’s part of a bigger pattern. It really bothers me when his family treats him like he has no life or marriage of his own—whether that’s buying tickets for him without checking in first, or constantly expecting him to drop everything to run errands and do favors for them.”
However, she also admitted that she wasn’t sure that she was reacting appropriately: “Since I don’t even want to attend, I feel a little petty for being irritated, especially since she isn’t a bad person. Can someone give me a reality check? Am I right to be annoyed by the lack of boundaries here, or am I making a mountain out of a molehill?”
Some commenters thought something else was going on
One Redditor commented, “Not asking him is a problem, but I think it’s weird that you seem to be opposed to your husband hanging out with his sister without you.” Another commenter pointed out in a reply to that, “OP said in another comment she has separation anxiety with her husband.”
According to Healthline, an anxious attachment style could lead to finding it difficult to spend time alone. You should seek help if “emotional distress begins to affect your daily life and personal relationships, you have panic attacks, you feel anxious and distressed days before the separation, or anxiety persists even after your reunion.”
For the most part, commenters felt that the poster was overreacting, although some admitted that they don’t know enough about the situation and how close the siblings might be to surprise each other with concert tickets. The poster was simply looking for a reality check, but even if this situation is linked to a pattern or other problems, it’s likely something her husband will have to navigate with his family.
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