Prepare to be served.
Hey, loser. What makes you think you have what it takes to join the volleyball team at anime high? You have no coordination, your hair is a normal color, AND you smell bad when you sweat. Everybody knows that anime characters smell like fresh cut flowers when they sweat. How could something so beautiful ever smell bad? You just smell like fear. You’re lucky there aren’t any dragon girls on the team. They would literally eat you for showing such weakness.
How about instead of trying to play a sport you’re not good at, you just watch a sport that other people are good at? It’s a win win. You get volleyball, and we keep our winning team of hot people as it is. So go ahead, knock yourself out with these anime.
7. Zoku Attacker You! Kin Medal e no Michi
Zoku Attacker You! Kin Medal e no Michi is about a group of teenagers who are way prettier than you’ll ever be achieving sports dreams that are way out of your league. These girls wanna be the best in the WORLD. You probably don’t even play well when it’s just you ALONE IN YOUR ROOM. AND they have to deal with sticky emotional feelings and family drama while they do it! I’m sure you do too. But unlike you, these characters are beautiful when they cry about it.
6. Shoujo Fight: Norainu-tachi no Odekake
Shoujo Fight: Norainu-tachi no Odekake is tailor made for thirsty-ass volleyball lovers like you who are only in it to get served to by total hotties. While this anime is only 30 minutes long, it’ll be more than enough time for you to get your weird volleyball rocks off. It’s about a girl named Neri Ooishi who is a total volleyball star. She was the captain of her elementary school team, and everyone thought that she was gonna go on to do big things in her high school career. But she walked away from the sport, which you should too, but for different reasons. Wanna find out what hers are? Guess you’re just gonna have to watch the anime and discover her deep dark feelings for yourself.
5. Attacker You!
Uh oh. More high schoolers who achieved more at 13 than you ever will. In Attacker You!, You Hazuki is a volleyball superstar with big dreams of representing her country in the 1988 Seoul Olympics. She joins her high school team and soon becomes a star player, but faces big hurdles along the way. Unlike you, her hurdles don’t involve trying to get out of bed before 11am every day. She’s got family problems, plus she has to face stiff competition from rival players. I’m sure you have family problems too, being such a disappointment to them all.
4. 2.43: Seiin Koukou Danshi Volley-bu
2.43: Seiin Koukou Danshi Volley-bu is about a talented middle schooler named Kimichika Haijima who returns to his hometown and reunites with his friend Yuni Kuroba, but you’ve probably never left your hometown, have you? The pair decide to join the volleyball team at their middle school, and Kimichika notices that his friend Yuni has actual talent at the sport. Wonder what that’s like, don’t you? Kimichika enlists a few of his other friends to join the volleyball team and try to go for the championship title, but they blow it in the prefectural tournament. They still probably got way further than you ever could, though. Yuni and Kimichika’s friendship suffers because of the loss, and a rift soon grows in between them. But unlike you and your childhood friends who went on to bigger and better things, Yuni and Kimichika decide to team up again and win the prefectural tournament at all costs.
Related: The 10 Best Anime Soundtracks, Ranked on We Got This Covered
3. Harukana Receive
Harukana Receive is a beach volleyball romp about two teenagers named Haruka Oozora and Kanata Higa. Haruka doesn’t have a clue about how to play beach volleyball, but unlike you, she can learn. After joining a beach volleyball game, Haruka decides that she loves the sport, as it gives her a reason to feel good about how tall she is (something that she feels self-conscious about). She ends up teaming up with fellow player Kanata Higa, whose short stature caused her to be abandoned by a former volleyball partner years before. The complementary pair go on to achieve big things on the court.
2. Ashita e Attack
In the mood for some retro anime? Of course you are. When are you not? Ashita e Attack was made to honor the Japanese women’s volleyball team who took home gold at the 1976 Olympics. I’m sure the last thing you took home was a weird opossum off the street. The show is about Mimi Hijiiri, who inspires her classmates to pick up volleyball again after the tragic death of one of their teammates. Forget whatever prefecture championship BS the boys of 2.43: Seiin Koukou Danshi Volley-bu were going for, these girls are going for the trophy at the National High School Volleyball League championship. The last thing you went for was a walk around the block.
1. Haikyuu!!
Haikyuu!! is not only the best volleyball anime of all time, but also one of the best sports anime of all time. It’s about short king Shouyou Hinata, who invigorates his middle school’s volleyball team after watching a superstar player in action. Things go sour at their first tournament match, where they are ruthlessly crushed by the “King of The Court” Tobio Kageyama and his team. This smarter-prettier-better-than-you teens aren’t going to give up without a fight, though. After entering high school and joining the volleyball team, Shouyou Hinata discovers that he and Tobio Kageyama are now on the same team. But it turns out that the “King of the Court” has some obstacles to overcome at the high school level, and the two boys pair up in order to push each other to excellence. This is what you need. A friend. A rival. Someone who’s gonna push you. Who’s gonna say really mean and out-of-pocket things to you in an effort to MOTIVATE YOU FOR EXCELLENCE.
Someone like me. Welcome to the team, loser.
(featured image: Sentai Filmworks)
