Allow Us To Explain
It seems like it was winter just yesterday, but already summer movie season is starting in the US with today's release of a little movie called Captain America: The Winter Soldier. A ton of movies are coming out over the next few months, some that we're looking forward to here at The Mary Sue (Guardians of the Galaxy), some that we're... not (Transformers: Age of Extinction). But we got curious: Which ones are you most looking forward to? So we asked. What follows is a roundup of the 2014 summer movie season, ranked from the flick you, our readers, are least anticipating to the one you're most chomping at the bit for. We've included our thoughts as well, plus a general sample of the responses we got to each film. (Are you in there? Step up and claim your wit!)
Transformers: Age of Extinction
What: Explosions. This time with Mark Wahlberg as Shia LaBeouf.
When: June 27th
Average Anticipation Level—from one (kill it with fire) to five (give it to me now): 1.55
You Say: “Guilty pleasure,” “This franchise needs to die a swift and decisive death. Preferably before this next one actually comes out,” “NOPE. NOPENOPENOPEITYNOPENOPE,” “This series has burned me before but Dinobots so I will probably give it a shot,” “Psh, Grimlock would never in a million years let Optimus ride him. Get the character right, Bay,” “GRIMLOCK MAD! Otherwise, don't care. Netflix.”
Rebecca Says: Yeah no.
Jill Says: BWOOOOOOOOOOOONG.
Susana Says: Nope. The trailer actually made me think a sentence I never thought possible: "Mark Wahlberg, you can do better than this."
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
What: A Michael Bay-produced reboot most notable for how it looked for a long time like the turtles would be aliens
When: August 8th
Average Anticipation Level: 1.77
You Say: “No,” “No,” “More no,” “I'm skeptical, but it would be nice to see a good TMNT movie,” “Bay sucks. But I love me some Turtles. I'll only see it in the theater if the ratings are good. Megan Fox is cool,” “Doesn't sound half bad so far, despite its pedigree,” “Oh man I know this one might burn me but I am kind of curious about it.”
Rebecca Says: I've never had any intention of seeing this movie, but I just looked at its IMDB page and saw no Casey Jones. Now I extra have no intention of seeing this movie.
Jill Says: I’ll go watch the cartoon.
Susana Says: Nah, bro. Nah.
Edge of Tomorrow
What: Tom Cruise doing a sci-fi thing. Emily Blunt is there, which is how you can tell this isn't last summer's Oblivion all over again.
When: June 6th
Average Anticipation Level: 2.05
You Say: “I love the concept and as much as I can appreciate Tom Cruise, it's clear this movie should be starring a young dude,” “What even is,” “Wait, is this the movie they secretly shot at Disney World/land?,” “If it weren't for Tom Cruise, this would be exciting and thrilling and ‘TAKE MY MONEY-’ worthy,” “I'm a sucker for time travel loop stories and it may or may not have some message about love transcending time and stuff and I am also a sucker for that so yes.”
Rebecca Says: ZZZZZZZZZZZ—I'm sorry, what?
Jill Says: THERE ARE TOO MANY MOVIES COMING OUT THIS SUMMER.
Susana Says: Oh, another movie where the twist is that there are a million Tom Cruises, except this time with time travel not alien clones. Yawn.
22 Jump Street
What: The sequel to 2012's 21 Jump Street, which shouldn't have been good but was, because what's what happen when Phil Lord and Chris Miller direct a movie.
When: June 13th
Average Anticipation Level: 2.12
You Say: “Just eurghggh! Ewwww!,” “21 Jump Street was a huge surprise, so I'm on board for the sequel,” “The first movie was so much better than it had any right to be,” “Do we really need more Jonah Hill in our lives?”
Rebecca Says: The trailers for this movie don't look great, but it's still Lord and Miller, so I'll probably give this one a shot unless the reviews are abysmal. Might be a Netflixer.
Jill Says: I was a HUGE Jump Street fan in the 80s and the first movie was just a whole buncha nope for me.
Susana Says: That's the one where cops go to high school?
What: The Rock is Hercules. That's all you need to know.
When: July 25th
Average Anticipation Level: 2.12
You Say: “Why are any other Hercules movies even bothering? Only the Rock can fill out that lion skin,” “This movie feels like it should have come out during the 90's,” “No. Just No,” “Hell to the yes. Another possible B movie to cherish forever,” “Probably a cable-and-beer movie,” “I watched the Tooth Fairy, I just can't say no to a Rock movie. *sigh* I need help,” “Hahaha! No.”
Rebecca Says: Sorry, Mr. The Rock, but this is probably a pass for me unless the reviews are either good or "classic B movie"-level bad.
Jill Says: I’ve been smelling what The Rock is cookin’ since the late 90s. Well, except for Tooth Fairy. I just... couldn’t.
Susana Says: Hahahahahahahahahahahaha go away and let me watch Xena in peace.
Dawn of the Planet of the Apes
What: Andy Serkis mo-caps back up for the sequel to the surprisingly good Rise of the Planet of the Apes.
When: July 11th
Average Anticipation Level: 2.27
You Say: “Flogging a dead ape. Stop!,” “SERKIS. OLDMAN. POST-APOCALYPTIC SURVIVAL. Yes,” “You mean YAWN of the Planet- you know what, I don't even care,” “I want to see Caesar kick some stupid humie butt!,” “Does anyone actually like this franchise? Not interested,” “Yes, yes because the first movie was awesome,” “I just want to see Any Serkis doing his schtick again.”
Rebecca Says: I don' t know what to think of this one. Rise was great, but part of the reason I enjoyed it so much is that I expected it to suck (see: Frozen). Should I go into Dawn expecting a worthy successor—its director Matt Reeves already has one you-think-it'll-suck-but-it-doesn't movie under his belt with the American remake of Let The Right One In—or do I try and temper my expectations in the hopes that I'll be pleasantly surprised a second time? I'm going to see Dawn eventually, because Gary Oldman. It'll depend on the reviews whether I catch it in theaters, though.
Jill Says: I was not impressed with the reboot but I’m a sucker for the concept so I’ll rent this one.
Susana Says: I didn't see the first one. Heard it was good, but I've got no particular itch for the concept. Pass.
What: Eeeevil supercomputer Johnny Depp as envisioned by first-time director (and frequently Christopher Nolan collaborator) Wally Pfister. Technology bad!
When: April 17th
Average Anticipation Level: 2.28
You Say: “Johnny Depp returning to The Ninth Gate level of seriousness? Well, at least he's not in pale makeup and a big hat,” “Doesn't ring a bell! Way to go, Transcendence marketing team,” “Don’t care,” “Great concept, but do we need another out of control white male ego to look at?”
Rebecca Says: Depp. Morgan Freeman. Rebecca Hall. Paul Bettany. Kate Mara. Cillian Murphy. There are so many good people in this movie. So why don't I care about it at all?
Jill Says: Gotta admit, this is the film I know the least about on this list, but it does look like interesting sci-fi fodder and has a great cast. This will probably be a rental for me, if only to see if Johnny Depp can still act outside his “wacky acting.”
Susana Says: I'd go see this if I could listen to my computational linguist roommate sputter and snort about people who get all apprehensive about the swiftly impending doom of the singularity while watching it.
What: The first film adaptation of Lois Lowry's Newberry-winning, dystopia-set children's classic. Taylor Swift is in it.
When: August 15th
Average Anticipation Level: 2.33
You Say: “This should be a more artistic, dark, quiet piece, not some melo-action bullsh*t with leftover The Host CGI,” “I want to see it, but I am a little afraid of the potential they have to butcher one of my favorite YA books,” “Why isn't it in black and white?,” “I'll just see Guardians of the Galaxy again.”
Rebecca Says: I love Lowry's book. Love. But the trailer makes this movie look like a generic Hollywood dystopian blockbuster, which offends me on a visceral and personal level. The marketing could always be misrepresenting the movie's quality (see: Frozen), so I'm not counting The Giver out entirely, but it had better get some damn good reviews for me to show up.
Jill Says: I’m sorry. I don’t even remember what this one is.
Susana Says: The first trailer didn't impress me, but if the movie can up its ad campaign game, I might be enticed to see it before it goes to Netflix.
What: Siblings Kaylie (Karen Gillan) and Tim (Brenton Thwaites) try to unlock the secret of a cursed mirror that played some of its mumbo jumbo on their mom (Katee Sackhoff) and dad (Rory Cochrane) when they were kids.
When: April 11th
Average Anticipation Level: 2.35
You Say: “Gah! Scary things! NO!,” “The whole apple/light bulb mixup that they keep showing in the commercials is dumb. Why would you put food next to light bulbs?,” “Karen Gillan + mindscrew horror is precisely my cup of tea,” “So much NOPE. *waves wimp flag*,” “I don't do scary movies...but Katee Sackhoff…”
Rebecca Says: Horror isn't usually my thing, but if it's Gillan and Sackhoff (and Lucas from Empire Records!)... yeah, I'm there.
Jill Says: Amy Pond and Kara Thrace in the same film? I’m basically already lined up for this one. I’m also a sucker for interesting horror, and if the latest trailer is any indication Oculus definitely fits the bill.
Susana Says: I like to see actors that I like getting work after a long streak at one job! I like horror that prominently features women, and mirrors are ripe with potential for all kinds of trippy stuff. But if you've read my review of The Last of Us you'll know that there's no way in heck that I'm going to see this movie. I wish it the best, but I am nope-ing out of here.
Sin City: A Dame to Kill For
What: Sin City 2: The Sinnier
When: August 22nd
Average Anticipation Level: 2.43
You Say: “What a weird time to do a sequel,” “Guilty pleasure,” “Interested to see this but it's just way late and off my radar now. Netflix, probably,” “Eh,” “The thing is so stupid and beautiful I can still have fun,” “Well it took them long enough.”
Rebecca Says: I might Netflix this. For Eva Green. No, I won't.
Jill Says: Kind of obsessed with the first one. I’ll be there with bells on.
Susana Says: I have a personal rule to never spend money on things based directly on Frank Miller stories. Throw this movie into the sun.
What: Gugu Mbatha-Raw stars in this period drama about Dido Elizabeth Belle, an illegitimate mixed-race woman raised by her aristocratic white family in 18th century England. Here, watch the trailer.
When: May 2nd
Average Anticipation Level: 2.59
You Say: “This... is a movie that is coming,” “Tt's unusual to see my own country's history of slavery and racism on the screen, not just US history,” “No idea what this is,” “I'm so excited for a European period piece featuring a woman of color,” “...I don't know what this is. Retelling Beauty and the Beast?”
Rebecca Says: I have a soft spot for costume dramas, and Belle's about a subject I haven't seen committed to film before. I'm there.
Jill Says: If this is a movie about Beauty and the Beast’s Belle becoming a Super Librarian, I’m in.
Susana Says: At our New York Comic Con panel this year I expressed a desire to see more multi-racial characters who are genuinely bridging two worlds instead of choosing between them, and Belle looks like it might be a beautiful example of that.
What: Dystopia on a train, with a cast that consists of a metric ton of amazing people. The movie that Harvey Weinstein wanted to gut.
When: June 27th
Average Anticipation Level: 2.63
You Say: “I’ve been waiting for this movie forever… Tilda Swinton at her most David Bowie-est,” “WHAT IS THIS?!!,” “Claustrophobic thrillers will always be a weakness for me,” “Tilda vs. Chris Evans? Yes please! This looks like a good 'un.”
Rebecca Says: Can I say something above a five? This movie is going to let me down, because I'm anticipating it so much. Moreso when it was announced that, in exchange for a limited release, Snowpiercer would be coming out sans Weinstein choppage.
Jill Says: Rent. But like, excitedly rent.
Susana Says: This movie sounds like a weird science fiction book I would have read once in middle school and then never been able to find again, but it has an absolutely nuts cast list. I'm down.
What: This follow up to Matrix creators Andy and Lana Wachowski's Cloud Atlas stars Space Princess Mila Kunis and Channing Tatum Pointy Ears.
When: July 18th
Average Anticipation Level: 2.73
You Say: “Space! Lady-protagonists! Shiny things! Aliens! More space! What more could you want?,” “Love the Wachowskis! A must see for me,” “So far, the trailers look cool but flat, formulaic. Just don't know,” “...the Wachowskis, trying to recapture the goodwill they got from The Matrix, then proceeded to lose with almost every other thing they've directed,” “The Wachowskis take risks, and don't assume the audience can't make intelligent leaps. I'm so there.”
Rebecca Says: The trailers make this movie look so generic. Barring great reviews, will probably skip.
Jill Says: I want this to be good. I don’t think this will be good.
Susana Says: The Wachowskis’ concepts always remind me of the kinds of stories I would have written in middle school, but refined, aged up, and executed in visually fascinating ways. At their best, they're also pretty emotionally resonant, so yeah, I'll show up for a lady led action film from them.
The Fault In Our Stars
What: Teen romance (with tragedy!) based on the best-selling book by John Green. It makes people on the Internet cry.
When: June 6th
Average Anticipation Level: 2.74
You Say: “I'll read the book and apparently cry for a week first,” “Not really my jam,” “Looks like the wrong kind of sappy and depressing, so no thanks,” “Looking forward to publicly ugly-crying myself into oblivion,” “If this movie in any way does not do justice to the book, I will go the hell off,” “This can only end with good things!”
Rebecca Says: Mehhhh. I read one Green's books. Didn't dig it. Movie looks schmaltzy. Will probably skip.
Jill Says: I hear this is a tear-your-heart-out kind of film. PASS.
Susana Says: Pretty sure that for personal reasons I won't be able to watch this movie for several years at least without having to take a week off to recover from it. That ain't the movie's fault, though.
Only Lovers Left Alive
What: Tom Hiddleston and Tilda Swinton as vampires. Also Mia Wasikowska, John Hurt, Anton Yelchin, and Jeffrey Wright.
When: April 11th
Average Anticipation Level: 2.9
You Say: “I don't have time in my life to watch sad vampires wander around f*cking Detroit, even if they are really pretty,” “Hiddleston fangirls alone will carry this film,” I feel like I've seen this entire movie via Tumblr gifs,” “If I wrote down a bunch of things I'd like to see in a movie and put them in a hat, and then someone pulled EVERY ONE OF THEM out to make a movie, it might be this movie,” “YES. THIS. TILDDLESTON 5EVA,” “Interesting cast and premise, but it looks like it could be a little obnoxious.”
Rebecca Says: I'm not as gaga over Hiddleston as much of Tumblr is (shut up, I'm not), but I'll definitely be seeing this. Looks like an interesting take on vampire mythology.
Jill Says: This movie looks bonkers, and that’s without considering who’s in it. I’m so there.
Susana Says: Tilda Swinton and Tom Hiddleston are immortal vampire rockstar lovers. John Hurt. Jeffrey Wright. Mia Wasikowska. Anton Yelchin. Even if it's not good, it'll be amazing to watch it unfold. And if it's not good, then that's plenty of time to contemplate where we decided that vampires and the la bohéme go together like peanut butter and jelly.
The Amazing Spider-Man 2
What: Andrew Garfield Being Adorable: The Sequel
When: May 2nd
Average Anticipation Level: 2.98
You Say: “I don't understand why they keep making this series… I would have preferred a series about Miles Morales if we're going to keep doing Spidey movies,” “ASM gave me the Peter Parker/Spider-Man I'd waited to see since the age of 4,” “I love the reboot of the Spiderman series and this is going to be fantastic!,” “Because Andrew Garfield. That's a legit reason, right?,” “Please be funnier than the 1st one!!,” “It doesn't look that great, actually. It looks like a superhero movie from 2002,” “I guess I need to finally see the first one?”
Rebecca Says: Yawn. Didn't like the first one. Zero interest here. Even AGarf won't do it for me.
Jill Says: I care not for this sequel. The first one wasn’t bad, and the acting was good, but it was a complete retread of the old material. Felt like a waste of time and considering what I’ve seen of the sequel so far, I doubt I’ll feel any different. Will not see this one in theaters and may not even bother to rent it.
Susana Says: I didn't see the first one, but I heard Garfield and Emma Stone had great chemistry. Unfortunately, that's not quite enough to get me into the theater. I am interested to see how the "The Avengers but with VILLAINS" plan works out for Sony.
What: Gareth Edwards, director of the 2010 indie hit Monsters, reboots this Japanese classic for a modern audience. Matthew Broderick is nowhere to be found.
When: May 16th
Average Anticipation Level: 3.14
You Say: “If this iteration of Godzilla doesn't work, at least we have Pacific Rim to console ourselves with,” "Again?," “GODZILLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-AAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!,” “I didn't sleep with a teddy bear as a child. I slept with a hard plastic Godzilla action figure. He will be accompanying me,” “Interested in a well-done Godzilla. Not interested in the grim look it has,” “This actually looks scary.”
Rebecca Says: The only thing I really didn't like about Monsters (no spoilers, but it has to do with the ending) was a result of Edwards having a shoestring budget. Now he's doing another monster movie with millions upon millions of dollars at his disposal. Opening weekend. I'm there.
Jill Says: Eh. Seems like this one will be an improvement on the last Godzilla movie, but I didn’t see that one either so...
Susana Says: It looks pretty cool to me, but I have so little invested in Godzilla as a brand that I actually genuinely enjoy the one with Matthew Broderick. And I respect you if you choose to discount my opinion based on that alone.
What: Disney tells Maleficent's (Angelina Jolie) side of the story in this twist on Sleeping Beauty.
When: May 30th
Average Anticipation Level: 3.5
You Say: “Those cheekbones!,” “This is going to be awful but I still can't wait to see it!,” “I like the premise, design, and casting, but it doesn't seem like the plot itself will be very intense or interesting,” “They couldn't have found a better Maleficent,” “Probably going to catch this on cable someday when I have a bunch of laundry to do,” “Garrhghgh! She has wings and horns and everything is so pretty!”
Rebecca Says: Explain to me why this probably won't be just another Alice in Wonderland, Jack the Giant Slayer, or Oz the Great and Powerful?
Jill Says: My inner child is freaking the f*ck out.
Susana Says: To be honest, I'm not convinced that this one is shaping up to be a genuinely good movie. It might be a case where I'd settle for a DVD of only the scenes with Angelina Jolie in them. (FYI, movies studios, I would also do this for Kevin Spacey in Superman Returns and Ian McKellen in The Golden Compass.)
How to Train Your Dragon 2
What: Hiccup is back riding dragons, and he got attractive. With bonus Cate Blanchett!
When: June 13th
Average Anticipation Level: 3.67
You Say: “SHUT UP AND TAKE MY SHEEP,” “Galadriel is riding a dragon. ALL WILL LOOK UPON ME AND DESPAIR!,” “We were Neville Longbottom'd by a cartoon,” “HELL YES MORE EFFING DRAGONS,” “The first one was pretty good, but I'm not in a big rush to see this,” “I'm hoping Astrid plays more of an action role and doesn't turn into ‘The Girlfriend’ stereotype of sitting around watching the male lead do things.”
Rebecca Says: Even if this is only half as good as How to Train Your Dragon, it'll still be worth the time. And who doesn't want more Scottish Viking?
Jill Says: I’m not sure I can go back to this joyful animated universe after Vikings, but...oh what am I saying? Of course I can!
Susana Says: I thought the first one was cute but took a number of shortcuts in writing and character development that's sadly characteristic for many movies that aim for a kid audience. I'll catch this once it shows up on Netflix.
X-Men: Days of Future Past
What: Wolverine is sent back in time by Sirs Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen so he can convince James McAvoy and Michael Fassbender to stop some crazy horrible thing from happening. Ellen Page sits in the corner, bitter about her movie being taken away from her.
When: May 23rd
Average Anticipation Level: 3.84
You Say: “More Fassbender and McAvoy and deadly robots, please don't ruin this Bryan Singer!,” “Can we stop having everything be about Wolverine please?,” “I like the X-Men because of its diverse cast. Now it's turning into an all-white all-male movie,” “I want to like this so badly but unfortunately I have long since given up on any X-Men related films living up to it's potential,” “It's not going to be good, but it's going to be AMAZING,” “*sugar high toddler grabby hands*,” “Don't suck. That's all I want is for it to not suck.”
Rebecca Says: I didn't like First Class all that much, but it's one of those movies that's gotten more enjoyable for me the further away I am from actually having sat through it. I'm down for this one, but I'm not expecting much from it.
Jill Says: 90S FEEEEEEELS. BISHOPPPPPPPP!!!!
Susana Says: Man, I can't wait to see Bryan Singer's best try at bringing the Alternate Timeline Shenanigans that are so core to modern X-Men continuity to a mainstream audience. Succeed or fail, it's going to be a wild ride. Also there's the chance that he might retcon X-Men: The Last Stand entirely, and I'll pay any price for that.
Captain America: The Winter Soldier
What: Captain America, but a '70s political thriller this time.
When: April 4th
Average Anticipation Level: 4.31
You Say: “Why is this not a Widow movie?!?!?,” “I'm excited about a lot of films coming out this year, but I literally want to throw up when I remember Captain America: The Winter Soldier is about to come out,” “Please put this in my eyeballs immediately,” “I think it's going to be ground-breaking, no hyperbole,” “I'm mostly looking forward to seeing more of Black Widow,” “All I want is one outtake of Sebastian Stan (the Winter Soldier) singing ‘Let It Go.’”
Rebecca Says: I wasn't all that impressed by the first Captain America—it felt way, way too much just like a prequel to The Avengers for me, in a way that Thor, etc. didn't so much. But I'm still looking forward to Winter Soldier. The early reviews have been great.
Jill Says: I’ll admit, the first Captain America wasn’t as exciting for me as a fan because I hadn’t read any Steve Rogers stories, but it won me over with its charm. That said, I’m slightly worried about The Winter Soldier being too much like The Avengers, and not enough (or any) of what I loved the most about the first film, which was the World War II stuff. That said, Kevin Feige keeps saying Black Widow is a major part of the movie (even if they didn’t include her in the title) and that i’m certainly excited for. This will probably be opening weekend viewing.
Susana Says: I was very impressed with the first Captain America's handling of what could have been a very simply told, painfully outdated story, and while I'm a little worried that Winter Soldier might not have enough superheroic optimism mixed in with its spy-thriller, I'm very excited for it. Marvel's first African American superhero getting his screen due, Chris Evans’ charming Steve Rogers dealing with his time jump, and Black Widow, lots more Black Widow. Maybe enough Black Widow that Kevin Feige will stop teasing us and just announce that she's getting a solo film.
Guardians of the Galaxy
What: OOGA CHAKA, OOGA OOGA OOGA CHAKA.
When: August 1st
Average Anticipation Level: 4.42
You Say: “I would give my first unborn child if I could see it today!!,” “But this trailer should be on movie-advertising university courses, if they exist,” “It looks like it might be good, but I don't understand the need for this movie. I would have MUCH rather seen a female-lead Marvel film for a character like Ms/Captain Marvel, Wasp, or She-Hulk,” “Wasn't too excited forward to it before the trailer came out, but I'm a little excited now,” “At first I was like Marvel? And a talking.... raccoon with a gun... uh.... then I fell in love with the trailer,” “AW YISS,” “Really. Can't. Wait. Is it here yet? When can I go? I hate waiting.”
Rebecca Says: Please. Like I'm gonna miss a chance to see an ab'ed up Andy Dwyer save the galaxy.
Jill Says: In Marvel Entertainment I trust.
Susana Says: I think this could be the Fifth Element of the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Give it to me now.
Bonus: Fifty Shades of Grey
What: Twilight: The Fanfic: The Movie Adaptation
When: February 13th 2015, actually. The original release date was August 1st; I missed that it changed because I don't keep up on my Fifty Shades news.
Average Anticipation Level: 1.18
You Say: “I'd at least respect this movie if they just said "f*** it" and went for the full NC-17,” “this can DIAF,” ““It's an abuse movie, and it glorifies that abuse… If we're going to do movies about sex, they should be fun and positive,” “LMFAO! No,” “I'd rather sit and watch 48 hours straight of Barney and Friends and Teletubbies than see 50 Shades of Grey,” “Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.”
Rebecca Says: "Hey, Rebecca, do you want to see 50 Shades of Gre—wait, put away that knife. I didn't mean it!"
Jill Says: I hope those looking forward to this feel leave the theater satisfied. THANK YOU, I’LL BE HERE ALL WEEK.
Susana Says: I prefer my porn in text or comic format, thank you. Also, I prefer it to be actual porn, not Rated-R.
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