Netflix just dropped the full first eight minutes of Stranger Things season 4, or Stranger Things 4 as they seem to be calling it for expediency. It’s a pretty cool slice to start fans off right in anticipation of the first batch of new episodes, which arrive on May 27, 2022. “Vol. 1.” will consist of seven episodes that drop on the 27th, while “Vol. 2” will conclude the season with two episodes that don’t come out until July 1st. That gives us an entire June of speculation and memes.
If you’re a Stranger Things fan, you’re likely ready to click the 8 minutes above and devour it, noting a million Easter eggs and nods to past seasons and characters. I, however, am a person who only watched Stranger Things season 1 in 2016, then didn’t really mesh with the later seasons. Still, I want to go on this adventure with you. So let’s watch. Here are my impressions as someone who liked this show just fine but hasn’t really thought about it in six years:
We’re back in the midwest somewhere! (I want to say Indiana?? Illinois?) A young paperboy is lobbing newspapers with expert aim as he bikes along a retro suburban street. I don’t think he’s any of the kids we once knew, they’re all like 25 now.
Cut to a hand taking in the newspaper, doing a crossword, cutting a bit of a tiny tree? bush?? with some wicked-looking scissors in what feels like a threatening manner. Then the person is getting dressed with precision. We see him in the mirror and it’s … some guy with gray hair!
I divert to IMDb to find out who he is. Oh crap, that’s Matthew Modine, of Full Metal Jacket fame! Sorry, Matthew.
A black title card announces that it is September 8th, 1979. I’m pretty sure this is now showing us stuff that happened before the start of the first season, because that was all about the ’80s nostalgia.
Then we’re looking at the mysterious-looking building for Hawkins International Laboratories, which I think is the place that Eleven escaped from way back when. I feel a deep and profound longing for Tales From the Loop.
Okay I think I was right about the lab, because now we see a whole bunch of kids and young adults in a weird rainbow room in hospital gowns with Eleven-esque buzzcuts. Most of them are doing telekinetic stuff with their minds, or else playing chess. (Maybe reading each other’s minds in the ultimate chess showdown?)
The creepy tree-cutting guy with the gray hair comes in. Oh no! Is he a bad doctor? I think he’s a bad doctor. He asks a kid with Eleven hair if he’s up for more lessons and the kid shakes a magic 8-ball to imply that he is. This is an extremely kid thing to do in any decade. They walk hand in hand down a lab corridor and the man is indeed identified as Dr. Brenner. I am going with my instinct that he is Bad.
They pass a closed door that only has one thing written on it—”11.” Eleven is here, folks!!! Even if we go right by and don’t see her.
Bad Doctor Brenner is doing some experiments with electrodes on Not!Eleven. He appears to be testing the kid’s remote viewing ability. The music spikes scarily as the kid sees in his mind what Dr. Brenner drew on a piece of paper. I forgot I stopped watching this show because I am easily frightened.
Dr. Brenner next has the kid use his ability to try to locate another doctor in the facility. The kid does so, finding her in a room with Six, another kid, who’s trying to move a red block with his mind. But something’s wrong!!! Something’s wrong and I am increasingly terrified.
The remote viewing kid reports that something is indeed wrong and that now the people he’s watching are screaming. There’s blood that he can see on the walls. Dr. Brenner wants to know why and then identifies the kid as Ten. That’s one before Eleven!
Alarms start going off. Sir, we’ve got a situation here!!! Ten reports that Six and Dr. Ellis are both dead. Cue sounds of screaming and commotion from outside of the room. The door flies open and knocks Dr. Brenner unconscious while I hide under my bed.
He wakes up in a destroyed, bloody lab with flickering lights which is the scariest thing you can do to a lab setting, and sees that Ten is dead. He takes the kid into his arms, distraught, and okay maybe he’s not so bad? Sorry about the slander before, Maybe Not Bad Dr. Brenner.
Dr. Brenner hears more screams and goes out to explore the terrifyingly torn-up laboratory. I start watching with one eye on the screen and the other on my bookshelf. He finds more and more slaughtered kids and staff. Oh God, all of the kids in the bizarro rainbow room are dead. Except …
One kid stands with their back to us by a shattered observation window. I think I know what’s coming but I’m still on edge.
Dr. Brenner says, “What have you done?” and the kid turns around and it’s a de-aged Millie Bobbie Brown as Eleven due to the magic of CGI, or maybe Millie is just such a good actress she can still look like a kid on demand? IDK. Either way, Dr. Brenner has identified Eleven as the problem here. Eleven’s bleeding from the eyes and extremely mad! And … we cut to black.
Thanks for joining me on that strange little trip, this was all actually extremely compelling and maybe I should just start watching Stranger Things 4? I’m not sure I have the fortitude for this much unsettling scariness, however, since this is just the first 8 minutes and I feel like I need to lie down to slow my heart rate.
What did you, as either a devoted fan or non-fan of Stranger Things, think about this extended first look? This is certainly one way to get our attention.
(images: Netflix)
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