Tommy Tuberville, Senator from Alabama

Tommy Tuberville Displays Breathtaking Lack of Self Awareness

Tommy Tuberville, the senior senator from Alabama, is proof that anyone can ruin a country if you’re dumb, mean, and hold true to your terrible ideas for long enough. Although now he’s ticked off the Democrats might be able to beat him at his own game. Maybe.

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If you haven’t been keeping up to date what this awful man has been up to in the Senate, you’re lucky. It’s deeply stupid and yet incredibly effective. See, he has decided to hold up military promotions, which must be confirmed by the Senate, until the Department of Defense reverses its stance on providing reimbursements for travel cost if members travel outside of their state to receive abortion care. This has been going on for nine months. Not great!

Now, the Senate Democrats are sick of this person’s one-man stand against something that really isn’t any of his business and are trying to find ways around Tuberville’s obstructionism as if he were a toddler throwing a tantrum in the candy aisle at Target. Tuberville, of course, is not happy about that either. Per CNN:

Republican Sen. Tommy Tuberville, who has held up military promotions for nine months, slammed a proposal being floated to change the chamber’s rules to allow a vote on many of the nominations en masse and attacked the White House and Senate Democrats for not negotiating with him.

“It’s typical of this place. This administration would rather burn the Senate down and that’s what would happen. … If you change the rules of the Senate then it lasts forever,” Tuberville told CNN’s Manu Raju. “So they would rather burn down the Senate than negotiate.”

So, this grown man has been throwing a hissy fit over the military managing itself and as a result, has decided to usurp one of the Constitutionally-mandated functions of the Senate, and now he’s upset that his colleagues are sick of his s*** and are trying to find ways to work around him now? Totally rational.

I love how he mentions the people who want to do their job as the ones burning down the Senate without any guile or self-awareness. This guy has refused to do the job he was hired to do and is complaining when people are trying to find ways around his incompetence.

He doubles down on the notion that the people who want to solve the problem are the problem and not, you know, the guy who created the problem in the first place. Per CNN:

The Alabama Republican added: “If they go around and, without negotiating, change the rules of the Senate it just goes to show you they want it their way or the highway.”

Genuinely, what’s it like to be able to go through life without the hyper self-awareness and self-loathing that seems intrinsically tied to my sense of being? It must be nice to wake up every day as Tommy Tuberville and believe so wholly that everyone else is the problem, and you, yourself, are perfect.

Believe it or not, whining to CNN isn’t going to stop the Senate Democrats from trying to get nine Republicans to agree with the rule change that would allow nominations to be pushed through en masse. Personally, I don’t care what tradition dictates or changing the rules to be updated because a mean-spirited man from a state I’ve never been to has decided that what he believes is what’s right, and as a result, everyone else must suffer. I’m pretty sure the Founding Fathers would be down for that change. Regardless, I’m also pretty sure the Founding Fathers would think I had a fresh mouth and talked like I was people to the menfolk, so I don’t particularly care what they would think about things in 2023. The fact is, the system is not working, and it’s all because of one person. (And for once, that person is not Joe Manchin.)

Unfortunately, this is the Senate we’re talking about, and Tuberville has already spoken to everyone’s (least) favorite (formerly) Democratic Senator about not supporting the rule change. I am, of course, talking about Kyrsten Sinema. Boooooo. Per CNN:

Tuberville also noted that he had spoken with Sen. Kyrsten Sinema, an Arizona Independent, for 30 minutes about the possible rule change and said he doesn’t think she would support it.

Please keep in mind that DoD officials have said this hold-up in promotions is negatively affecting combat readiness. Per CNN:

Last month, Navy Secretary Carlos Del Toro told CNN the holds would have a “negative impact” on combat readiness. He was joined by the secretaries for the Army and Air Force in describing Tuberville’s actions as harmful to US interests.

It’s a mess! It is my sincere wish for this country that we stop electing people who have no interest in governing into the government. This is what happens when college football coaches become Senators. Nothing good!

(Photo by Kevin Dietsch/Getty Images)


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Kate Hudson
Kate Hudson (no, not that one) has been writing about pop culture and reality TV in particular for six years, and is a Contributing Writer at The Mary Sue. With a deep and unwavering love of Twilight and Con Air, she absolutely understands her taste in pop culture is both wonderful and terrible at the same time. She is the co-host of the popular Bravo trivia podcast Bravo Replay, and her favorite Bravolebrity is Kate Chastain, and not because they have the same first name, but it helps.