Lauren Eliza, known better by her TikTok handle, Lauren the Mortician, built a career sharing her experiences as a mortician on the platform. However, she is now stirring controversy over her tasteless feud with another creator and allegations that she is transphobic.
Eliza boasts a following of 2.5 million on TikTok and has nearly 70 million “likes” across her videos. While her content is a bit morbid, given her line of work, she has actually used her platform to educate users about death. In the past, she has worked to raise awareness for lesser-known hazards that could result in tragic deaths to help parents be on the lookout for danger. Last year, she made a TikTok compiling a list of the deadliest foods, urging parents to exercise caution when giving their children foods with choking hazards, such as popcorn, grapes, and nuts. Given what she has witnessed and heard in her job, she does have a unique perspective to offer, and giving people safety tips on dangers they might not otherwise think of is quite a good use of TikTok.
However, anyone trying to educate others or give advice and recommendations to a significant following needs to exercise caution and ensure that they’re not giving out misinformation. They must never present themselves as experts on topics they aren’t qualified for. This is why some users have found Eliza’s car seat reviews and recommendations problematic. What was even more problematic than her car seat videos was how she responded to being politely corrected by an actual expert on car seat safety.
Lauren Eliza’s feud with Jamie Grayson reflects poorly on her character
The controversy surrounding Eliza started in August when Jamie Grayson posted a TikTok cautioning viewers not to take car seat advice from non-experts like Eliza. For those unfamiliar with Grayson, he is a certified Child Passenger Safety Technician (CPST) who educates parents and caregivers on proper car seat usage. He has been a CPST for a decade and often uses his platform for educational purposes. After constantly getting tagged in Eliza’s videos and told that his advice and knowledge of car seats were wrong because Eliza said something contrary to him, he decided to post a TikTok merely explaining why Eliza was incorrect in labeling several types of car seats as dangerous and urging viewers to be wary of advice from non-professionals.
No one who watches his video would declare it hateful in any way. He was very respectful towards Eliza and praised her work. Additionally, he makes a critical point about car seat manufacturing and CPST certification work, and his video could put many concerned parents at ease. Eliza didn’t even have to respond to the video, but if she did, a reasonable response would be to acknowledge that she’s not an expert in the field and to clarify that her videos are her personal opinion and not meant to be taken as factual. Instead, she had a very tasteless response to Grayson.
She took to Facebook on October 17 posing, a “hypothetical” question. While she didn’t name Grayson, it was obvious she was talking about him. She asked her followers, “Would you take BABY PRODUCT ADVICE from a man who has no children… has 12-15 strollers inside their living room… also attempts to give baby wearing/ baby carrier product recommendations, car seat recs AND high chair recommendations to actual mothers?” Eliza then went on to insinuate he was just looking for financial gain and that she’d never take his advice. It’s bizarre that she would get this defensive over his mild video, but it’s also very discriminatory to dismiss someone’s experience and expertise just because they’re not a parent. Additionally, she purposefully left out his certification and field of work to make it sound like he was some kind of creep with a house filled with baby products for no reason.
As if her Facebook post wasn’t bad enough, she reiterated these sentiments on an episode of the podcast Dumb Blonde. TikTok user @bekahdayyy shared Eliza’s response, which was filled with misinformation and outright lies. She ridiculed Grayson’s certification and once again insisted that because he was a man and not a father, he wasn’t allowed to give parents safety advice—even though he’s certified, and that’s literally his job. Eliza also lied, claiming that he launched a “hate campaign” against her and tried to make it seem like he was a scammer with a fake career.
Now, there are circumstances in which men shouldn’t be giving advice to women and mothers. However, this is not one of those instances. He’s a certified professional who can provide far more qualified advice than Eliza can. Given that the number one safety issue with car seats is improper use, it’s very shocking that she would try so hard to ridicule and discredit this line of work. Her response was very petty, hateful, and uncalled for. It says a lot about someone’s character when they can’t handle a simple correction and, instead of owning up to their mistakes, they try to mock, humiliate, and silence anyone who offers constructive criticism.
Lauren the Mortician’s anti-LGBTQ+ social media activity
Eliza’s feud with Grayson led to heightened scrutiny around the creator, and those digging a bit deeper found some evidence of her being transphobic. TikTok user @caffinatedkitti posted a video in which she compiled all of the alt-right and transphobic creators and content that Eliza followed or liked. According to @caffinatedkitti, the content Eliza was “liking” was extremely hateful and transphobic. The user also shared that Eliza blocked her and was blocking anyone who questioned her social media activity, which definitely raised suspicion. Why is she acting so afraid if she isn’t doing anything wrong?
Eliza posted a response to the anti-LGBTQ+ allegations on October 24, but it won’t do much to ease concerns. First, she admitted to following Anthony Raimondi, who goes by conservativeant online. Raimondi is a notorious member of the anti-LGBTQ+ extremist coalition Gays Against Groomers, which provides false narratives about the LGBTQ+ community. Eliza literally used the “he’s gay” excuse to dismiss his hateful rhetoric and make it seem like there’s nothing wrong with her following him and being friends with him.
In another video, she failed to address the allegations fully, merely insinuating that because she’s queer, she must be for the LGBTQ+ community. Of course, she also used the opportunity to take a jab at Grayson, claiming that he’s the only one responsible for the allegations, although many users have been questioning her social media activity.
There’s no excuse for supporting alt-right, anti-LGBTQ+ influencers whatsoever. So, for Eliza to make a video defending following Raimondi is very concerning. Also, this generic response of being for women and the LGBTQ+ community without providing any proof or acknowledging the vast majority of her problematic social media behavior doesn’t do much to quell the anti-LGBTQ+ allegations. Additionally, she has been found giving misinformation via her platform, and her shocking response to being called out for it makes one question her intentions and how this TikTok fame is impacting her. Eliza needs to adequately address her social media activity and apologize to Grayson because her actions have made it questionable if she truly deserves the support she receives or if she can be trusted to work to provide truly educational content without letting her ego get in the way.
(featured image: @lovee.miss.lauren / TikTok)
