Astarion in the Baldur's Gate 3 Demo shirtless and ready to do some night exercises.

The Number One Thing To Keep in Mind While Romancing in ‘Baldur’s Gate 3’

Finding companionship in Faerûn.

Just a few hours out from the PC release of Baldur’s Gate 3 (BG3), now is the time to finalize your play style. You can change this up at any time—and your class at least once. However, romancing and building companionship complicates things. Like IRL dating and friendships, first impressions are everything.

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This is not a full breakdown of how to romance, but there are some basics we need to get out of the way before we get to the main rule. First of all, anyone (playable character) can find love with another person regardless of gender, race/species (to an extent), class (D&D or otherwise), etc. There are only two types of characters you can’t romance in-game, even if you’re romancing IRL. (Look what this game is doing to me.)

In BG3′s 22nd Community Update, Larian Studios wrote:

Our relationship system is designed for romancing NPCs only; however, if you and your co-op partner both kiss your monitors at the same time, the static shock you’ll experience produces a heart-racing effect similar to the feeling of love. If you begin to feel pain or numbness in your limbs, please go to a hospital immediately

The seven pre-made, playable characters cannot romance one another. So, Lae’zel and Shadowheart couldn’t romance even if they didn’t hate one another. However, they may develop relationships with others who may join your party later in the game. These include characters like Halsin (who we saw as a bear during the teaser) and Minthara. Romancing is a bonus to the game, but it should be taken semi-seriously if you wish to indulge in moonlit conversations or romps, because Larian Studios has warned that these relationships affect the game.

With that in mind, there’s one major thing you’ll want to remember to keep things going the way you want.

Alignment is (almost) everything

Shadowheart and character looking at lights dancing in the sky.
(Larian Studios)

From Lawful Good to Chaotic Evil, these characters will have their own alignment and interest that influence their reactions to your actions. Throughout your time in FaerĂ»n, everyone you pick up in your party (even if they stay at camp) has a favorability rating with you. The favorability meter moves very slowly and doesn’t leave much room for error. (Though you can always reload to an earlier save point.) They will approve or disapprove of the choices you make—not just with dialogue and side-quests, either. They judge when and how you fight.

For example, if you play a fairly straight-edged, goody-two-shoes, then characters like Astarion (my favorite) won’t like you. If you know you’re about to do some real heroic deeds, either leave him at camp or have him far away from the action. (No promises he won’t find out anyway.) Astarion and Lae’zel both have cruel personalities and prefer similar people. However, Lae’zel is committed to duty. Shadowheart and Lae’zel are similar in personality, and yet if you are nice to one, the other will probably hate you because Shadowheart is openly anti-Gith. I’ve only scratched the surface, and you can see how tangled these relationships are. So far, there are up to 10 options of people that can join your (up to) four-person party.

Guides online may help you win favor with characters by understanding what kind of alignment they’re looking for, but they do contain spoilers. I prefer to make mistakes and learn about their personalities, likes/dislikes, etc. as I move through the game. Just like real relationships, you need to listen (you can view past conversation transcripts at any time) and be considerate—to a certain extent. Be careful not to seem desperate because some will clock that rather quickly. While romancing is fun, it isn’t the primary goal of the game. Stay true to yourself (or your character), and compromise with your companions.

Larian revealed that some characters would be open to polyamory, but unless your primary romancing partner is open to that, you might cause trouble down the line. If I had to guess, I think Lae’zel and Wyll might be okay with this, but probably not Shadowheart. Word on the forums is Gale is one of the hardest characters to romance, so opening up your heart and pixelated body to another might destroy that fragile relationship. Astarion is a toss-up because he’s very free-spirited but also extremely snarky and jealous.

Again, while you can’t predict everything, by listening and understanding these characters—rather than just trying to jump their bones—you will have a better idea of how they will respond to various situations whether they be these optional romances or key bits of the game’s narrative.

(featured image: screencap/Larian Studios)


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Author
Alyssa Shotwell
(she/her) Award-winning artist and writer with professional experience and education in graphic design, art history, and museum studies. She began her career in journalism in October 2017 when she joined her student newspaper as the Online Editor. This resident of the yeeHaw land spends most of her time drawing, reading and playing the same handful of video games—even as the playtime on Steam reaches the quadruple digits. Currently playing: Baldur's Gate 3 & Oxygen Not Included.