Science Shows That People Who Watch Sitcoms Instead of Rom-Coms Are Bitter, Cynical Assholes

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Did you watch How I Met Your Mother? If so, science says you’re a bitter husk of a human being, and not because of the finale.

A University of Michigan study has found that those who watch rom-coms and romance-themed reality shows like The Bachelor tend to have a more pie-in-the-sky view of love—responding positively to statements like “When you meet the right person, you know it almost immediately” or “My ‘true love’ will be nearly perfect.”—than those who watch sitcoms with romance-based subplots like How I Met Your Mother and The Big Bang Theory.

Moreover, the effect increases over time: The more you watch Ted Mosby fail to get his shit together, the more you start to believe “true wuv” is nothing but a farce. While by the time you get to cycle 28, or whatever, of The Bachelor, you’re primed to believe that Fabio’s going to ride through your door on a white horse and take you away to a tropical beach where you’ll lounge on a hammock made out of his long, lustrous hair while he feeds you Mai Tais. Because a group of people manipulating and backstabbing each other so they can get with some rich guy whom they might not even like if they met in real life is the pinnacle of romance, y’all.

The study seems to hypothesize that internalizing sitcoms’ a-new-significant-other-every-week view of romance is what hardens their viewers’ hearts, but it makes sense to me that cynical assholes (that’s me, right here) would be more likely to watch Seinfeld over The Bachelor in the first place. Either way: No hock, Sherlock.

Regardless, the study also shows that those with a more idealistic view of romance tend to have happier, more committed relationships. Yeah, well. I have a happy, committed relationship with my Netflix account. So nyeh.

(via The A.V. Club)

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