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New, 100% Canon Star Wars Comics Make a Bonkers Original Trilogy Character Revelation

Chewy, is that news?

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Remember when Lucasfilm, now owned by Disney and churning out all the new Star Wars material we can handle, chucked the entirety of the Star Wars Expanded Universe out the window with the promise that all Star Wars stories in the future would be 100% canon? That certainly makes this addition to a major character’s story from Star Wars #6 seem like a pretty big deal.

Are you ready?

Are you sure?

Spoilers below the gifs.

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Here’s the relevant page out of the issue that casts Han Solo in a whole new light:

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(Click to enlarge.)

YEAH. Han Solo’s wife. You officially have my attention, Star Wars comics.

Darth Vader is Luke’s dad! Luke is Leia’s brother! HAN WAS MARRIED THE WHOLE TIME LIKE SOME KIND OF NUPTIAL BRUCE WILLIS. Does that mean the Force is the sixth sense? Was Leia initially so curt with Han because she is strong with the Force? “I see scumbag-cheater people!” -Leia

Yes, this comic takes place after the destruction of the first Death Star and before The Empire Strikes Back, so we have to imagine that there’ll be a reasonable explanation for this. But the reveal drops at the end of the issue, which hit stores today, so we don’t know yet just what that explanation is.

Maybe it was a marriage never intended to be real and only used to achieve some kind of mutually beneficial outlaw goal for Han and Sana, but she still likes to throw it in his face to scare away potential love interests for funsies? I’m sure he deserves it. Maybe they’re already in the middle of a nasty divorce? Or… maybe Han’s just a giant jerk?

I have to assume it’s not the latter. Otherwise, we’d expect Empire and Jedi Leia to be less like this:

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And more like this:

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Less like this:

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And more like this:

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Less like—oh, you get it. Anyone have any other theories on how Han comes out of this without being the worst?

(via io9)

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Dan is a video game modding hobbyist and secret ninja who lives in North Carolina with his wife, Lisa Brown, and his dog, Liz Lemon, both of whom are the best.