Spokane woman thought her marriage ended after ten years. Then, she found out he resented her through the years over $90,000
She believes she wasn't the problem.
Brandy Brou (@witchesbrou) shared how her divorce was triggered on TikTok. She knew that her marriage was on the verge of collapse, but didn’t think that it had started earlier than she suspected.
“In a not-so-surprising turn of events, my marriage ended last night,” Brou told TikTok on September 22. She thought it would have ended earlier in May, during her birthday. Brou said her social media followers expected him not to step up and become a better partner, and that they would eventually divorce. However, their marriage lasted a few more months until they brought up divorce in September.
“I was not expecting it to be randomly over in September. That was kind of a surprise, and now, I am looking for an apartment in Spokane,” Brou said. She and her husband have been together for ten years, and for the last three years, Brou stayed at home while he worked for the household. It wasn’t always that way, and Brou was initially worried that once she started doing all the housework while he focused on work and paying the bills, she wouldn’t be able to change the dynamic.
“Once a man gets a taste of that, he is never going to be able to go back to ever taking care of himself,” she argued. However, one of her works went viral on social media, and Brou said she tried negotiating the housework and labor with her husband. She explained, “I have to add more jobs onto my plate, and these are not just jobs. These are dreams that I’ve been chasing my whole life, and something has to fall away. And I believe what has to fall away is the position I’m playing as wife and mother to you.” However, Brou alleged he failed to step up.
A divorce in the making
“And then last week, I ate tuna fish sandwiches for dinner, three nights in a row,” Brou said. She claimed that her husband refused to make her dinner. Brou didn’t understand why he didn’t want to care for her, so she confronted her husband.
“It hasn’t always been like this. My husband and I were friends at the beginning, like, something drastic changed, and I was too busy to, like, clue in,” she speculated. When they finally talked, Brou said her husband had been harboring resentment toward her two years into their relationship. They weren’t married yet. It was technically the first year of their romantic relationship, when he got $90,000 for an undisclosed reason. Although he got what Brou described as “dead nana money,” they weren’t married yet. She clarified that she had no say in how he managed it, but she pushed him to use the money to buy a house.
Brou explained that at the time, she was fighting for custody of her daughter from a previous relationship. She thought having a home would look good in court. Furthermore, she also saw the possibility of raising another child in that new home, since she and her husband were about to get married. Instead, Brou said the proposal brought about a huge fight between her and her husband.
Blaming her for his losses
“And it was a flat-out no. He was not going to buy a house with that money,” Brou said. She alleged that she watched her husband squander the money on alcohol, cigarettes, and marijuana. The money also went toward rent, but Brou claimed it was “wasted.”
“It was life-changing money. We could have been living a completely different life if he would’ve done anything responsible with it,” Brou said. Some marriages don’t end because of one explosive fight. In a similar case, one man explained that his marriage slowly deteriorated when he made honesty feel expensive.
But the confrontation didn’t end there. Brou alleged that her husband believes he would still have the $90,000 if it weren’t for her. She argued that she wasn’t the drinker in the relationship. Brou also said she smokes only four cigarettes a day. Brou feels punished and said she no longer wants to continue the marriage, especially since her husband stands to inherit a large sum from his parents. She doesn’t want to be blamed again.
“He needs to go off and waste all of his parents’ money so he can see that I wasn’t the problem,” she commented. Brou’s expectations were failed, but at least it didn’t take her 30 years to walk away. Another woman from Virginia wasn’t so lucky and was left by her husband with nothing but their five kids to feed.
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