Woman from Virginia said she was a tradwife for 30 years, until her husband abruptly left her with their five kids: ‘I’m out of tricks at this point’
She's starting from scratch.
Mel Ryder (@extradwife7) from Virginia said she was a tradwife for 30 years. But now, she’s starting over again after her husband allegedly left her and her five children behind.
“So, this is day one of me figuring out a new life. For the last almost 30 years, I’ve been a tradwife,” Ryder told TikTok. She focused on caring for her husband, their home, their pets, and even their five children. Ryder claimed that she even homeschooled the children.
“And then, eight months ago, he left,” Ryder alleged. She said she was used to taking care of the home, and his absence didn’t make much difference. He allegedly told her he would give his wife a year to “figure things out.” Ryder agreed and proceeded to acquire her real estate license.
“In a year, I should be able to have enough business to be alright,” she assumed. Alongside her newly acquired real estate license, she has been teaching ESL classes online. However, even though she loved teaching online, she said that it didn’t provide enough to support a household.
“About two months into it, he decided that he did not, in fact, owe me or the kids anything. And he quit paying any of the bills,” Ryder claimed. Although their marriage had deteriorated, they still had a house and, supposedly, two children in college. Ryder said her husband “just quit” on supporting her and their children, like an Airbnb host canceling last minute on a booked client.
She further alleged, “And then he maxed out all our credit cards, and then he cashed out his retirement, so the kids and I couldn’t have access to it, and drained the bank accounts.” Ryder, on the other hand, shared that she has been working multiple jobs to make ends meet at home.
No longer a tradwife
“So, I’ve been working miracles to this point, keeping the lights on and putting food on the table. And I’m out of tricks at this point,” she shared. Ryder said she’s looking for a third job and couldn’t pay the bills this month.
“I’m not sleeping. I’m not really eating. I am so stressed,” she admitted. However, she still wanted to share her journey on social media. She explained, “If I keep track of the days, then maybe I can live to live another one.” In addition to her husband walking out on her, Ryder said she also lost friends during her journey, claiming that other tradwives “don’t like women who don’t have husbands.”
Regardless, her TikTok clip went viral. Some social media commenters advised Ryder to get a lawyer, with one comment stating, “He can’t decide that he doesn’t owe anything. There are laws, you need a lawyer, and you need to be legally separated to protect your financial well-being at this point, and his wages can be garnished he owes you money.” Others also sent messages of support, telling Ryder that she’s “about to bloom” and experience freedom.
In a follow-up video, Ryder said she consulted an attorney. Since her husband allegedly got fired from his job, she wouldn’t be able to receive child support and spousal support, even if they got divorced. She commented, “I trusted someone for 30 years that I should not have trusted, and I’m gonna get out of this.” Ryder has opened a GoFundMe for legal fees and her family’s needs.
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