Can you believe that in the year 2018, we have lived to see not one, not two, but three seasons of Riverdale come to pass? Sometimes good things do happen. Despite my many, many criticisms of the series, it is a show I continuously go back to because it just has a fun cast of characters, and I can truly say that you never know exactly what to expect when you tune in.
While last season’s Black Hood storyline was our ’80s horror movie slasher, this third season looks culty, and you know what that means: mother fucking Sabrinaaaaaaa.
Besides the promise of witchier things to come, the trailer also highlights the romantic angst of Veronica and Archie. As we may have been trying to forget, Archie spent most of the last season trying to prove himself to Hiram Lodge by committing crimes, and then found himself being framed for murder by Hiram. How will Veronica handle this evil daddy issue, we shall find out, but she promises her dad that no matter what, she and Archie are “endgame.”
Archie is sporting a Serpent tattoo, probably with permission from the “King of the Serpents,” Jughead (that sentence makes me lol), likely to get some protection in jail from all the other gangs. I doubt that Archie will spend very long in jail, as the promo indicates, but at least he got a good press-on tattoo out of the experience.
In other couple news, we see the two main hetero couples hanging out and making out, but, surprise, Kevin and Moose also get to share a kiss. I hope that this means Kevin will get some screentime and get to have a positive relationship. Maybe? Please? At least Moose means some bisexual male representation, something we are severely lacking in, pop culture-wise.
Toni looks great, as does Cheryl, as she very on-brand chews a cherry. I hope we can see some more Choni scenes, because those two characters have great romantic chemistry, and I have a mighty need for it.
FP and Alice get to have sex (finally), and we get a glimpse of the serpent tattoo on Alice’s thigh. I wonder how she covered that up on trips to the beach?
And then finally, the thing that’s really important: the cult/witchy stuff. While the Chilling Aventures of Sabrina is going to be on Netflix, Riverdale is not missing the chance to bring that level of drama to the series. We see Betty reading a book with witch/cult images before passing out, and a very Hannibal-inspired horned creature. Plus, there is a scene of what looks like Alice holding a baby next to another woman holding her baby. Very Witches of East End. I’m here for it.
The trailer ends with Jughead in the field, calling out for help as bodies are arranged helplessly in an occult-like fashion.
Yes. Yes. I’m so excited. I don’t care if it’s gonna be corny; I want some Sabrina in my Riverdale.
So for those still in the cult of Riverdale, what do you think of this promo? Is it looking better than all that Black Hood crap, and will Archie be allowed to be a normal teenager this season? We shall see.
( image: Screengrab/CW)
Want more stories like this? Become a subscriber and support the site!
—The Mary Sue has a strict comment policy that forbids, but is not limited to, personal insults toward anyone, hate speech, and trolling.—
Have a tip we should know? firstname.lastname@example.org