Director J.J. Abrams Thought About Killing Off Jar Jar Binks Like Any Good Star Wars Fan in His Position
Good, good. Give in to your anger.
“Thought”… “Fantasized”… Same thing, right?
The Vanity Fair behind-the-scenes photo shoot for Star Wars: The Force Awakens already brought us a bunch of exciting details and confirmations, but this latest bit of information may be the most encouraging sign yet that director J.J. Abrams truly understands what fans want from the franchise. In the editing room, Abrams indicated a frame of desert from the film and told Vanity Fair contributing editor Bruce Handy,
I have a thought about putting Jar Jar Binks’s bones in the desert there. I’m serious! Only three people will notice, but they’ll love it.
What? No! Way more than three people will notice it, and they will love it. OK, sure, that’s probably the comedian version of “I’m serious,” but come on. Do it. You know you want to.
Surely, Jar Jar’s gotta be really old by the time The Force Awakens picks up anyway. How long is a Gungan lifespan? Maybe he died of natural causes and we could all just get some closure. Yeah, that’s it. That sounds much nicer.
The Vanity Fair story, available digitally
today tomorrow in their June issue, features more Annie Leibovitz images from the set, including a bunch of the puppets used in Abram’s commitment to practical effects to get the franchise feel right and Adam Driver/Poe Dameron’s very real X-wing. There’s even an interesting bit about Abrams not wanting to digitally smooth out the quirks of a puppet popping up out of the desert just for that old-school feel for anyone who wasn’t sold on his commitment yet.
But really, all this overcompensation has revealed the dark truth: the J.J. in Abrams’ name stands for Jar Jar, and Disney has allowed him to remake Star Wars in his image. It’s all been a sham! Truly, this is the phantom menace we were warned about years ago.
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