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Fox News Finds the Real Tragedy in COVID-19: Not Being Able to Get Your Nails Done

Fox and Friends co-host Ainsley Earhardt is more worried about her hair than human lives.


fox and friends a-holes

As COVID-19 spreads across America and the world at large, Republican propaganda machine Fox News has been taking its cues from Donald Trump. Like the president, they started with outright denials of the virus, calling it a hoax and a scheme by democrats to remove Trump from office. But as the spread of the virus turned pandemic and the death toll grew, they’ve since walked back their claims.

Now, Fox News is relying on its old standbys racism and fear-mongering in their coverage of the virus. In addition, Fox and Friends co-host Ainsley Earhardt took a break from demanding to speak to your manager to address the real victim of COVID-19, women’s hair and nails.

Earhardt said, “Women, all my friends are saying, you know, this is not a priority, people are dying and I realize that, but they can’t get their nails done.”

Nothing more dire than maintaining your color and your manicure, am I right ladies? After you’ve finished your thrifty European travels, of course!

Earhardt continued with her out of touch and puzzling rant, singling out the struggles of not getting back to Manhattan. After all, bills are piling up, and she has stuff to do! She followed up by saying, “If you bought clothes before all of this happened, if you want to return it, are stores gonna waive that 30-day period where you get your money back if you need to return something?”

Ah yes, the 30 day return policy. God forbid a wealthy white woman can’t return her athleisure wear at Neiman Marcus without the poors coughing all over her. I mean, even for a Fox News anchor, this is wildly disconnected from reality. People quickly took to Twitter to lambast Earhardt for her ignorance and callous attitude in the face of the pandemic:

Sending our condolences to Ainsley’s hair and nails during this troubling time.

(image: Fox News)

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Chelsea was born and raised in New Orleans, which explains her affinity for cheesy grits and Britney Spears. She currently lives in sunny Los Angeles, with her husband and two poorly behaved rescue dogs. She is a former roller derby girl and a black belt in Judo, so she is not to be trifled with. She loves the word “Jewess” and wishes more people used it to describe her.