There are good people out there who feel nothing but sadness that a former President now has a mugshot. I am not one of them. I was glued to my computer last night until Donald Trump’s mugshot was released unto the world, and I cackled with glee because he is a terrible person and deserves every bad thing coming his way.
Naturally, Trump is trying to spin this into something he can control because that’s what hucksters do. It also smacks of trying to get in on the joke in the mistaken belief that you’re not entirely the setup, build, and punchline. I am, of course, talking about Trump’s incredibly pathetic return to Twitter last night to post his own mugshot and a link to his website. LOL. Sad! Here it is so you can laugh at it:
So, first and foremost, we all agree he is not bright enough to knowingly understand the irony of writing “NEVER SURRENDER” under a photo where he literally surrendered to the authorities—and is thus their prisoner, yes? Like, he’s just not smart enough to comprehend that, which makes it funnier for all of us, right? Let’s not overthink it; just enjoy the high probability any one of us could beat this man at the strategy game of our choice. (Dibs on Trivial Pursuit!)
Secondly, of all the reasons to return to Twitter after getting kicked off for inciting an Insurrection, he picks this?! (Side note, that was a top 10 day on Twitter if you weren’t lucky enough to experience him having his account deleted, and then he kept trying to get back on the site via various accounts, only to have them shut down, too.) Sad! This is your mugshot, my dude. I understand you want to try to own the narrative, but come on now. There’s really no way of owning this and making it your own. #FreeWinona, this is not.
Let’s dive into the weird image he posted, too. It’s clear comma use would have been his friend here because you can easily change the meaning behind what he posted. There is an ever so slight possibility the man actually meant: ELECTION INTERFERENCE NEVER, SURRENDER DONALDJTRUMP.COM! So you could see it as an omission of guilt for what he just got arrested for in Georgia. The words are in the same order, and one little comma makes all the world of difference. However, he’s a Republican, so he probably hates education, just like all the other Republicans running for president this time around. Which is to say, he likely doesn’t understand comma usage in general. (Also, yes, I did put in some wonky commas use for the internet warriors among us to catch and throw in my face. That was intentional, you’re welcome.)
Now, look, like any good consumer in a dying post-capitalist society, I hate myself the appropriate amount, so I did wade into the replies of the above Tweet for a minute, and it’s just as sad as you would think. Here’s Roseanne Barr calling him “punk rock” and friends, I do not think that word combo means what she thinks it means.
Gentle reader, I assure you his Tweet is as punk rock as being a nepobaby hire at Goldman Sachs.
The replies are ridiculous. Just a bunch of weirdos stoking this man’s ego and screaming into the void. Now, I realize I’m the jagoff writing about them, so no one really wins in this situation, but sometimes it’s good for one’s ego to see how other people spend their finite precious time with their one life to live. I assure you, you can never have a truly bad day when reading replies to a Trump tweet because at least you know you haven’t sunk to those depths.
Look, this literal insurrectionist tried to start a viral trend by also posting their mug shot (which he got because he invaded the Capitol on Jan 6), and surprisingly enough, not many people with mugshots wanted to join in?! Go figure.
The whole thing is odd, sad, and pathetic. Observing it is like seeing the worst party ever happening and people taunting you from it that you can’t join in without realizing how pitiful the whole display is. There’s a part of you that wants to engage just to let them know you think know you’re better than them, but you also understand that way leads to madness and destruction because you’ll never get through. Alas, the whole shebang is as futile as Donald Trump believing he could interfere with an election in Georgia and not get his a** handed to him.
Anyway, I think the real takeaway here is that nothing really good happens on Twitter, and yet many people can’t quit it completely, myself and Inmate No. P01135809 from the Fulton County Jail included.
(featured image: Jeff Swensen, Getty Images)
