‘Why does this happen so often???’: Woman goes hiking with her boyfriend. Then he vanishes

It sounds like a joke: “I lost my boyfriend in the mountains, where is he now?” But for the Sydney, Australia-based Lara Marcellin (@thespicypisces444) it was a terrifying scenario turned into a painful lesson. 

“I don’t know where the [expletive] I am, I don’t know where I’m going, I’m just following a path,” she says between gasps for air. 

She’s wearing a backpack, dressed in hiking gear, and it quickly becomes clear that she’s been the victim of an “Alpine Divorce.” 

What Is An Alpine Divorce?

The phrase Alpine Divorce describes the phenomenon of a couple (typically heterosexual) going on a hike or outdoor adventure, and then the (often) more experienced man leaves his partner behind. Recent reporting suggests that it is more common than you might think.

In Marcellin’s video, she trains the camera on herself, but as she spins around, presumably trying to get her bearings, it is clear that she is far away from the car and other people. Under the on-screen text, “PSA ladies never go hiking with a man,” she alleges her hiking partner stranded her. 

What Happened To Her?

In a follow-up video shot from her bed, that’s basically proof of life, Marcellin promises to post a more in-depth update. But first, she needs to process. Subsequently, she posts a video where she answers questions and explains the timeline. 

Marcellin alleges that she walked a little off the trail because she had to use the bathroom. After “popping a squat,” she says she got up, looked around, and “he was gone.” 

“Gone.” 

Since there wasn’t a lot of tree cover, when she popped up, she was initially concerned he’d dropped dead. Because she didn’t see him standing up. After calling and texting to no avail, she finally found him. He was purportedly “Sitting on a log, eating a sandwich,” she says. 

In an email to The Mary Sue, Marcellin recounts that it took over two hours to find her way back to the car, and when she did, her hiking partner was visibly angry. She alleges he said, “He didn’t realize he couldn’t go off on his own.”

She says she replied, “That isn’t a problem; the problem is if I knew we were solo hiking I would have prepared accordingly.” Then she told him, “You abandoned me to die,” and he replied with, “Well you wouldn’t have a chance surviving in the wild.”

When asked by users in the comments, “Why would you go hiking with a man?” she answers that she’s known him for two years and trusted him. Several users also ask why she made a TikTok about Alpine Divorce instead of calling the police. She explains that her phone was nearly dead. By making a video and including her surroundings, if something happened, the authorities could retrace her iCloud. 

Then Lara advises fellow would-be hikers, especially women. “If you’re going hiking with someone, whether you trust them or not, please be equipped and prepared for the situation.” 

Record Your Hikes, Track Your Movements 

In addition to questions and sympathy, the comments section is full of actionable advice. 

“Ladies, if you hike, download AllTrails. Then each time you start, record your hike. It will track your movements on a map. Even if you lose service, you will still be able to see yourself moving on the map. It will get you back to the trailhead. Use it every time no matter who you’re with,” says VSround2 (@vsround2). 

While Fayls (@fayls_1) advises treating hiking with a man like hiking alone. Take a paper map and compass, and a downloaded digital map that tracks even offline. Additional things include warm clothing, snacks, and water.  

Then another user recounts the time her hiking partner walked off and made new friends. “This happened to me in the snow in Utah,” asserts Nicole [blue heart emoji]G7 (@nicoleignatiev4). “He had been hiking for 6 hours and he went to see what was on the top of a small hill since it was getting dark. He ended up drinking with strangers instead of coming back. I was terrified,” she said.

@thatspicypisces444 eventually i found the car but please don't be spontaneous and hike with men. this guy fully stranded me 2 hours from the car #hike #womenhikers #scary ♬ original sound – lara°❀.ೃ࿔*

What Is Happening? Why Is This So (Seemingly) Common? 

Psychologists theorize that many factors can go into an Alpine Divorce. But sometimes the stress and physical rigour needed to complete a tough hike can exacerbate cracks already present in a relationship. Paired with a lack of empathy, not much emotional control, and disdain, the result can be a “tough luck disappearing act,” reports Psychology Today.  

Wed to egotistical ideas of personal glory, or just boredom. Many women say they have been abandoned on a hike, only to reunite with their partner further down the trail. 

However, for men who choose to take a less experienced partner on a more taxing hike, there’s legal precedent. Leaving them behind might be a crime. An Austrian man who abandoned his girlfriend near that country’s tallest peak was found to be negligent. The lawyers presented a case that argued he was the de facto “responsible guide” on the climb. His partner died due to exposure while on the mountain. 

Thus, if you’re going hiking, remember you can only really rely on yourself. So charge that phone, carry that water, check the weather, and have your own map. Preparation isn’t optional; it’s survival. 

The Mary Sue reached out to Lara via email and TikTok direct message.

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