Everything You Need To Prepare For The Impending Zombie Apocalypse On A Charm Bracelet

Braaaaiiiinnnnns

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For just $34.60, Etsy seller PlayBox has everything you need to survive a plague of zombies on one, tiny bracelet (enlarging technology not included). Read ahead for the complete list of necessary items.  

Weapons: Assault Rifle
Shotgun
Revolver
Hand Grenade
Ammo (bullet)

Food & Water: Bottle
Tinned Beans
Tinned Fruit (random selection from Peaches, Pears, Cherries, Mandarin Oranges, Pineapple and Mixed Fruit although feel free to choose if you wish)

Tools: Knife
Spanner
Hammer
Pliers
Hacksaw
Axe

Essentials: Mobile Phone
Radio
Binoculars
Jerry Can (please note that this charm is fragile)
Matches
First Aid Kit
Lantern
Torch
Map
Compass (fully functional)

Now, I’m just gonna say it, you might as well use the mobile phone to bash a zombie’s brains in because that won’t be useful for long. Other than that, I am down for some mixed fruit and a shotgun.

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Author
Jill Pantozzi
Jill Pantozzi is a pop-culture journalist and host who writes about all things nerdy and beyond! She’s Editor in Chief of the geek girl culture site The Mary Sue (Abrams Media Network), and hosts her own blog “Has Boobs, Reads Comics” (TheNerdyBird.com). She co-hosts the Crazy Sexy Geeks podcast along with superhero historian Alan Kistler, contributed to a book of essays titled “Chicks Read Comics,” (Mad Norwegian Press) and had her first comic book story in the IDW anthology, “Womanthology.” In 2012, she was featured on National Geographic’s "Comic Store Heroes," a documentary on the lives of comic book fans and the following year she was one of many Batman fans profiled in the documentary, "Legends of the Knight."