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Poems

  1. Haven’t Read 50 Shades Yet? Read This Dr. Seuss-Style Poem Summary Instead

    Really, though, you don't have to read 50 Shades. Just... don't.

    Generally the less I have to think about 50 Shades of Grey, the better. I say generally, though, because occasionally this truly terrible phenomenon can give way to some surprisingly enjoyable parodies. Such is the case with a certain ExplainlikeIAmA thread on Reddit in which user Traceofbass lays out the plot of 50 Shades in the style of Dr. Seuss. Prepare to have your childhood ruined. Or enhanced, if you're into that sort of thing, I guess.

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  2. Chinese Riddle in Which Every Syllable Is Pronounced /Shi/

    As every student of Chinese has learned with some vexation, it's a hard language to learn because so much meaning is packed in such a limited toolset. There are only about 400 possible syllable sounds in Mandarin Chinese, on top of which can be layered four different tones (five if you include the neutral tone), for a total of about 1,700 possible syllables versus 8,000 in English. To make matters more complicated, many different characters are pronounced in the exact same way, such that meaning can only be deciphered with context. This Chinese riddle takes this principle to its logical extreme: It's comprised entirely using about 80 different "shi" sounds (pronounced with a hint of an r sound) in a mix of the four different tones. Certainly puts "Buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo buffalo buffalo Buffalo buffalo" to shame.

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