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Tumblr’s Most Choice Takes on Martin Scorsese’s Unreleased Homoerotic Masterpiece, ‘Goncharov’

Gaslight, Gatekeep, Goncharov

Beautiful fake poster for Goncharov, a fake Martin Scorsese movie, designed by artist Alex Korotchuk

Oh, how fickle the internet’s attention is. I pitched this piece and figured by the time Thanksgiving break was over, we’d still be gushing over Goncharov. But I guess other, newer movies have viewers’ attentions now. I suppose that’s the nature of the biz, and frankly, I’m not here for it.

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Goncharov was queering mafia cinema before whatever Grimes tried to do with “Kill v. Maim,” and dammit, I can’t let go! I refuse to let us continue to live in denial over this movie, which Scorsese himself has owned up to:

Goncharov is fake,” my ass. Even Lynda Carter is a fan, and if Lynda Carter is a fan, then y’all have no choice but to actually watch it:

One user shared a fairly good analysis of why the hype has died down, and why Tumblr is the only thing keeping it alive:

Here’s an example of this WLW warrior action:

But it goes beyond WLW—this movie is also for MLM! Observe, more fan-art:

Honestly, it’s such a topical film, it’s hard to believe it’s almost 50 years old:

But a very convenient way to keep the love for this movie alive is to listen to the score, which has been thoughtfully compiled here:

And if you’re still fairly confused about the plot, our own Benedetta Geddo shared a fantastic write-up on it. The main plot beats are condensed here:

Knowing all this, I’m so glad the casting went in the direction it did, or else we coulda had a wet noodle of a movie:

This might be the best take I’ve seen on the movie as a whole:

And these GIFs from the actual movie are superbly rendered:

But to cap it all off, I just have to say … ugh …I need an aspirin, I can’t do this anymore. Apparently the word of the year is “Gaslighting” and the last thing I need is to be added as an example to that list. Too bad Sophia wasn’t so wise to this.

(featured image: Alex Korotchuk)

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Madeline Carpou
Madeline (she/her) is a staff writer with a focus on AANHPI and mixed-race representation. She enjoys covering a wide variety of topics, but her primary beats are music and gaming. Her journey into digital media began in college, primarily regarding audio: in 2018, she started producing her own music, which helped her secure a radio show and co-produce a local history podcast through 2019 and 2020. After graduating from UC Santa Cruz summa cum laude, her focus shifted to digital writing, where she's happy to say her History degree has certainly come in handy! When she's not working, she enjoys taking long walks, playing the guitar, and writing her own little stories (which may or may not ever see the light of day).

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