tucker carlson celebrities

Tucker Carlson’s Attempt to Shame Celebrities for Donating to Bail Funds Backfires Wildly

Meet Cucker Tarlson, everyone!
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Human pocket square Tucker Carlson delivered a monologue on his Fox News show, where he called out celebrities for donating to bail funds for Black Lives Matter protesters. Carlson’s “exposé” included a scrolling list of celebs like Chrissy Teigen, Janelle Monae, Steve Carell, Patton Oswalt, Harry Styles, Seth Rogen, Don Cheadle, and many more, who Carlson accused of freeing “looters and rioters.”

Carlson also railed against donations from “cynical, soulless, craven corporations” like Pepsi, Intel, AirBnB. The clip is wild, as Carlson clearly believes he’s exposing something negative about these celebs. Who is going to tell him that we love and support these celebs for helping free these crusaders for racial justice?

The clip is so out of touch and disconnected from our current reality. Does Carlson really believe we’re shocked to find out that *checks notes* COLIN KAEPERNICK supports the Black Lives Matter protesters?! Or that Fox News viewers have even heard of Kehlani? The shoddily assembled rogues gallery didn’t even bother to spell Chrissy Teigen’s name correctly.

In response, writer Jesse McLaren has edited the list of scrolling celebrities with new additions, including Blue from Blue’s Clues, Young and Middle-Aged Sheldon, and the Hamburglar. He also added a photo of a mustachioed Tucker Carlson dressed like the Riddler, with the name Cucker Tarlson.

Cucker Tarlson. Help, I can’t stop laughing.

Cucker Tarlson, welcome to the resistance! The video immediately took off, and “Cucker Tarlson” is now trending on Twitter.

Meanwhile, the internet responded to Cucker’s segment by roundly roasting him on social media:

Everything is awful right now, but at least we can enjoy the moment of pure levity that is Cucker Tarlson. Sorry dude, that’s new name now and forever.

(image: Fox News)

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Chelsea Steiner
Chelsea was born and raised in New Orleans, which explains her affinity for cheesy grits and Britney Spears. An pop culture journalist since 2012, her work has appeared on Autostraddle, AfterEllen, and more. Her beats include queer popular culture, film, television, republican clownery, and the unwavering belief that 'The Long Kiss Goodnight' is the greatest movie ever made. She currently resides in sunny Los Angeles, with her husband, 2 sons, and one poorly behaved rescue dog. She is a former roller derby girl and a black belt in Judo, so she is not to be trifled with. She loves the word “Jewess” and wishes more people used it to describe her.