Things We Saw Today: Teleport Your Eyes & See the World From Your Bellybutton

Today in “lol whut” we have a very earnest and very bizarre Kickstarter aimed at bringing you some majorly tweaked eyesight. World, meet EYEteleporter, which wants to teleport your eyes. Periscopes, man. Periscopes. I’m assuming the products do not come with the cat they have on display. (via Kickstarter)

• If women with illogical (read: no) body hair in survival situations in TV and movies pisses you off as much as it does me, congratulations! There is now a Buzzfeed post for us. My only nitpick is that Katniss shouldn’t be on here because the Capitol stole all her body hair. (via Buzzfeed)
• Today in Health Care Horrors, this Canadian woman accidentally had her baby in America and walked away with a medical bill of almost a million dollars and (I’m guessing here) perhaps a deeper understanding of the timeliness of Breaking Bad’s medical care catalyst. (via Death and Taxes)

• Here is Klingon Bloodwine that, by god, will take up residence in my stomach one day. (via Star Trek)
• A widow in Wales brought her husband’s literal ashes to T-mobile and they still won’t cancel his contract. :/ (via Jezebel)
• Sony is gonna pay those Playstation Vita customers back. (via Huffington Post)

Ludicrous human Pat Robertson would like you to know that RPGs like Dungeons & Dragons lead to demonic possession. Lol Pat Robertson. (via Christian Nightmares) Are you following The Mary Sue on Twitter, Facebook, Tumblr, Pinterest, & Google +?