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Watch Jon Stewart Gloriously Fail to Be Positive About Trump on The Late Show

“Donald Trump … is not a cannibal.”

On The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, Stephen welcomed back his compatriot in comedy Jon Stewart. Clad in a t-shirt and jeans, Stewart still appears to be in his post-Daily Show relaxation stage (sometimes he segments into The Late Show from “a cabin in the woods.”)

Here, Stewart and Colbert are riffing on Trump’s angry tweets that he’s being picked on by late night hosts. (I don’t know about you, but I remember every President in my lifetime being the butt of jokes on late night TV—but only one thin-skinned orange monster who whined and went on the attack about it.)

In the name of giving Trump the kinder coverage that he wants, Jon and Stephen set out to provide “equal time” between negative and positive aspects of the President. It goes about as well as you might expect.

Here’s a sample, if you can’t play the video at the moment:

Colbert: Last week we learned that Trump’s own Secretary of State called him a “f*cking moron.” Not only is that an insult, he gave away Trump’s secret service codename.

Stewart: All right, I’ve got this one … given the choice between having hot lava poured into my pee-hole, and Donald Trump being President … I choose lava.

And then there’s this:

Colbert: On Friday, Trump made it easier to deny women birth control. Pretty soon, the only contraceptive women will have is his face.

Stewart: Donald Trump is great to women!

Colbert: Great?

Stewart: Good.

Colbert: Good?

Stewart: … better than Harvey Weinstein?

Colbert: Maybe. I’d fact check that.

How I miss seeing these two together. Off to start a petition for Stewart to be a regular on The Late Show.

P.S. A bonus we got from the clip: here’s what The Late Show imagines as the opposite of The Big Bang Theory:

(images: screengrab)

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Kaila is a lifelong New Yorker. She's written for io9, Gizmodo, New York Magazine, The Awl, Wired, Cosmopolitan, and once published a Harlequin novel you'll never find.