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Stephen Colbert Reminds Al Franken What Is & Isn’t His “Right as an Entertainer”

Spoiler: groping women "isn't."

Democrat Chuck Schumer and majority leader Mitch McConnel have gotten a lot of attention for calling on Senator Al Franken to resign, but so have–and please let’s not ignore this–a whole bunch of female politicians. From Claire McCaskill to Kristen Gillibrand to Nancy Pelosi, the number of women calling out Franken should not be ignored.

Yet as of my writing this Wednesday night, Franken has not yet resigned. That very well may have changed by the time I wake up Thursday morning. It’s expected to, as he’s announced an announcement to come Thursday.

Yes, apparently nothing can be done without a teaser trailer sort of advance leak first. Consider this your political Avengers teaser trailer. Franken will announce something sometime soon.

For now, though, Franken is accused of all sorts of sexual assault. The latest instance involves attempting to forcibly kiss a congressional aide, allegedly claiming such contact is “his right as an entertainer.”

That staffer told Politico, “He was between me and the door, and he was coming at me to kiss me. It was very quick, and I think my brain had to work really hard to be like ‘Wait, what is happening?’ But I knew whatever was happening was not right, and I ducked.”

Uh, yeah, Franken? Colbert–like all of us–would like to disagree with that point. An entertainer himself, he can confirm your professional bill of rights is limited to just a few things: 1. Skipping the line at Disneyland, 2. Skipping the line at airports, and 3. Just any and all Apple products you could possibly want.

THAT’S IT. You do not get to skip the line of consent.

Tell your celebrity abuser friends. This is where your list of privileges ends.

(image: screencap)

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Vivian Kane (she/her) has a lot of opinions about a lot of things. Born in San Francisco and radicalized in Los Angeles, she now lives in Kansas City, Missouri with her husband Brock Wilbur and too many cats.