“My Wife Knows Everything” Beats “My Wife Doesn’t Know” In Hilariously-Called Horserace

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This is fabulous. Monmouth Park racetrack announcer Larry Collmus is a real pro — no matter what the horses are named. In this hilarious race, those horses include a horse called “My Wife Knows Everything” and one called “My Wife Doesn’t Know.” The full clip below shows the entire race, with the two horses battling it out around the track until they pull ahead in a dead-head battle for supremacy in an argument as old as The Honeymooners. If you were born in the 80s and don’t get that, look it up. It’s hilarious to hear Collmus’ voice rise in pitch as he excitedly calls the race — never missing a beat.

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