Every day, we seem to get one step closer to just saying “f**k it” and going and living on the moon. I’m ready to go right now. If you recall, as NASA teased last week, there was a big announcement about the moon today. It turned out out to be an extremely exciting one that also facilitates my desire to depart from our hell planet.
We just announced that – for the first time – we’ve confirmed H2O💧 in sunlit☀️ areas of the Moon. This indicates that water might be distributed across the lunar surface. https://t.co/Gn0DSu5K95
— NASA Moon (@NASAMoon) October 26, 2020
According to CNN, the NASA press conference stated that there was more water on the moon than previously thought, even on the moon’s sunlit surface, and not limited to the colder, shadowed areas. Meaning that I could live there now, right? Is that what it means? Perhaps prior to election day? However, if I’ve learned ANYTHING from Doctor Who, it’s that I’m not going to an alien place and drinking the water immediately. But I will happily splash around in the distant sunny moon pools of my dreams while I await filtration methods.
Per NASA:
“We had indications that H2O – the familiar water we know – might be present on the sunlit side of the Moon,” said Paul Hertz, director of the Astrophysics Division in the Science Mission Directorate at NASA Headquarters in Washington. “Now we know it is there. This discovery challenges our understanding of the lunar surface and raises intriguing questions about resources relevant for deep space exploration.”
SOFIA (which stands for Stratospheric Observatory for Infrared Astronomy, we’re at some Tony Stark levels here, people) discovered the water on the sunlit area of the moon, so there could be water across the lunar surface. Jacob Bleacher, chief exploration scientist for NASA’s Human Exploration and Operations Mission Directorate, thinks that if there is enough water for the NASA crew, they could leave more water behind on earth and thus have space to bring more equipment with them to test while on the moon. (WHY ARE WE DRINKING THE WATER THOUGH? I DON’T TRUST SPACE WATER.)
Regardless of moon-water-drinking concerns, this was an incredibly exciting discovery. And because the internet will continue to Internet, the revelation that the moon is wet (teehee) caused social media to react in kind.
— Dana Schwartz (@DanaSchwartzzz) October 26, 2020
What I would give to have a sip of the forbidden moon water https://t.co/5bs7IZBiww
— kaburagi simp (@body_riddle) October 26, 2020
nasa employee: oh hey u guys are back early
astronaut: moon’s wet
nasa employee: what?
astronaut: *grabbing a bucket and a mop and getting back on the rocket-ship* moon’s wet
— eric van helsing (@seamoosi) October 26, 2020
*loading rocket launcher* moon’s wet
— The Daniel Jonestown Massacre (@alex_navarro) October 26, 2020
*cocks super soaker* moon’s wet https://t.co/KMKyVmIuKe
— a-hex-is dreadd (@alexisthenedd) October 26, 2020
the two only two jokes we can make today are “wet ass moon” and “*cocks gun* moon’s wet”
— dickgirl boxxy (@sylvisurfer) October 26, 2020
have you tried putting the moon in a bag of rice
— jessica is in spain but the s is silent (@jeslach) October 26, 2020
Is it sad that in 2020 I read the news from NASA and my first thought was “wow moon, just in time to save us”? Probably, but I also feel like this year has broken me beyond repair. So once we figure out how to let people live on the moon, please take this piece as my official cry to be one of the first people to go. I will even consider drinking the water.
(image: NBC)
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