Today in “Uhhh…”: 7 Out of 10 Single Men’s Coffee Tables Have Fecal Bacteria on Them
Here’s a statistic that will make foul bachelor frogs rejoice and will probably not give many women confidence in the hygienic abilities of their boyfriends: According to a recent microbiological study of single men’s apartments, seven out of ten coffee tables surveyed were host to coliform bacteria, “a variety of bacteria abundant in the feces of warm-blooded animals.”
So, uh, how did it get there?
“I would suspect the guys probably put their feet up on the coffee table. About 90 percent of shoes have fecal bacteria on the bottom after you wear them for three months,” said Gerba, professor of microbiology at the University of Arizona. “My wife never puts her feet on the table. I do, and I keep getting told to take them off.”
To be fair, coliforms were discovered on the same surfaces in some of the bachelorettes’ homes. The bugs just weren’t quite as common — or plentiful — at the ladies’ digs. Except for one spot: 33 percent of the women’s front doorknobs harbored colonies of coliforms.
To be fair, the study was commissioned by Clorox, so a little skepticism may be warranted. Sadly, though, this seems all too plausible. We wonder if these guys have anything to do with it.