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“Jurassic Park Updates” Twitter Account Is Bloody Hilarious

Jurassic Park Updates Parody Twitter account

We have few enough sources of hilarity these days, which is one reason why the new Twitter account Jurassic Park Updates (@JurassicPark2go) has caught on like wildfire in the dinosaur-infested underbrush. The account, which has about 230 tweets at the time of writing, has racked up more than 130,000 followers with its tongue-in-cheek “updates” from the staff of the world’s worst idea for a theme park.

Per its bio, the parody account is run by 12 people—writers, comedians, writers who are also comedians, comedians who are also writers, and so on and so forth. As such it’s impossible to tell who is responsible for each tweet, so let’s assume they’re emerging fully formed from this hivemind collective. “Updates” writer PJ Evans also created the hilarious @Disneyland2go account, which posts irreverent, often bitingly sarcastic “insider” tweets about the Disney park.

This is the kind of criticism Disney deserves right now:

But we’re here for Jurassic Park, which is a good deal more fun than the actual horrors happening as Disney reopens despite record-breaking numbers of COVID-19 cases. Shall we visit that faraway island?

There are so many great tweets in this account’s early days that it’s hard to feature only a few, but here are some favorites:

Give @JurassicPark2go a follow for even more dino vs. guest shenanigans and be sure to check out the team behind the T. rex:

@pjayevans, @NotJosephGarcia, @rajat_suresh, @Colinoscopy, @totallymorgan, @julieabridged, @astonoha, @quakerraina, @carmchristopher, @jayweingarten, @dlicj, and @sarahsquirm

Jurassic Park Updates twitter account

(images: Universal Studios)

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Kaila is a lifelong New Yorker. She's written for io9, Gizmodo, New York Magazine, The Awl, Wired, Cosmopolitan, and once published a Harlequin novel you'll never find.