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“Jared Leto Returns From Desert Retreat to Discover COVID-19 Outbreak” Is Not a Phrase I Had on My Apocalypse Mad Libs

jared leto

By now, nearly everyone on this planet has learned of the COVID-19 global pandemic. Everyone that is, except Oscar-winning actor and World’s Worst Joker, Jared Leto. The actor tweeted that he apparently missed the international news story, as he was at a desert retreat sans any sort of communication.

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Yes, Leto pulled a Rick Grimes on this one, and in the most Leto way imaginable. In fact, legend has it that if you say “Jared Leto” three times into a mirror, he will magically appear in your bathroom and lecture you on how his silent retreat really taught him how to listen.

Luckily, the internet has come together in these trying times to dunk on Leto and give us all a laugh:

Why is this so funny? Is it just the image of Jared Leto sitting in a meditation circle while the world burns around him (which is peak Joker TBH)? Is it funny because dunking on Jared Leto is in itself a good time? I’m not here to ask questions, I’m just here to laugh.

In slightly less hilarious news, guess who else has no idea about COVID-19. The casts of the popular reality series Big Brother, which is currently running in countries all across the globe. There are 13 contestants on Big Brother Deutschland, who have been on lockdown since early February. Wilder still, the German show just added 4 new contestants last week, who are all forbidden from mentioning the virus to their housemates.

In response to public outcry, the producers of the series will be revealing the news to the contestants tonight. While most versions of the show have broken the isolation and informed the contestants already, the Brazilian and Israeli versions of the show have not.

What a time to be alive.

(via Time, image: JEAN-BAPTISTE LACROIX/AFP via Getty Images)

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Chelsea Steiner
Chelsea was born and raised in New Orleans, which explains her affinity for cheesy grits and Britney Spears. An pop culture journalist since 2012, her work has appeared on Autostraddle, AfterEllen, and more. Her beats include queer popular culture, film, television, republican clownery, and the unwavering belief that 'The Long Kiss Goodnight' is the greatest movie ever made. She currently resides in sunny Los Angeles, with her husband, 2 sons, and one poorly behaved rescue dog. She is a former roller derby girl and a black belt in Judo, so she is not to be trifled with. She loves the word “Jewess” and wishes more people used it to describe her.

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