Full disclosure: I’m polyamorous. I also have the audacity to own a collection of Funko Pops as a person in her mid-40s. I’m also fully aware that polyamory isn’t “better” or “more mature” than monogamy (nor is it “worse” or “less mature”). Ditto owning Funko Pops, but somehow, that’s become a debate on the internet.
Comedian Keara Sullivan (@superkeara on TikTok) will have you know she is fine with people choosing to be polyamorous. (Thanks, Keara! We were wondering, and are now so relieved.) What she is not fine with is people making serious points about it while daring to have a Funko Pop visible in the background of whatever video they’ve made to make said point:
In her video, Sullivan says, “If I can see a little Funko Pop head peeking out in the background, I’m not going to hear you out when you explain how you have a more mature lifestyle than me,” and proceeds to go all in on this idea that owning a Funko Pop discredits any claim on maturity a person has.
Sullivan then doubles down on her point about Funko Pops in a video where she deals with an admittedly silly accusation of “ableism” for her original statement.
I should probably also mention that I’m neurodivergent. So yes, I’m hitting all the stereotypes: bisexual, polyamorous, neurodivergent. I mean, sometimes I feel like a character someone made up in a terrible movie, but I assure you I am very real.
But saying that Funko Pops are immature is ableist? The assumption that the Funko Pop owner in question must be neurodivergent in some way in order to “need” to own Funko Pops is doing some heavy lifting. And that isn’t exactly a better point to make, especially when the idea of what “maturity” even entails is the thing that deserves scrutiny.
Fun and whimsy are not the exclusive purview of children
I get that, as a comedian, Sullivan intended this as a light “gotcha” for laughs and not a genuine condemnation of Funko Pop owners, okay? That said, the premise of the joke is still worth discussing, especially as it’s likely that the reason she thought this would be a good joke is because she knew that plenty of people would agree with her. Yeah, polyamory is immature, just like Funko Pops! You tell ’em!
Sure enough, the video is rife with comments from people either telling anecdotes about terrible polyamorous people they’ve known/dated/met—which of course confirms polyamory as the “less mature” relationship style—or they’re confirming the immaturity of owning Funko Pop figures. And there are one or two poly people in there confirming that they do, indeed, own Funko Pops.
What no one is doing is talking about what they mean when they say “maturity.” It’s just taken for granted that we all know what “maturity” means, and clearly it has nothing to do with Funko Pop figures. One commenter even went so far as to say, “I remember the day my frontal lobe clicked into place because I got up and took the funko pops out of my bookshelves.”
Really? I’m sorry that your frontal lobe “clicking into place” means that you forgot how to experience joy.
What we mean when we say “maturity”
I hate to pull the Age Card, but I’m going to, as I suspect that I’m quite a bit older than Ms. Sullivan. What I’m not saying is that I’m automatically “more mature” because I’m older. I know plenty of people my age and older who are immature as all get out. What I am saying is that as one gets older and learns more about the world and their place in it, their perspective is such that they are less tied to certain accepted “markers” of maturity.
Like, when you’re ten, you might think that you’ll “definitely be married with kids by 25!” Then you get to be 25 and you’re like, “Marriage? In this economy?” Suddenly, that absolute marker of “maturity” is less absolute.
One’s interests, hobbies, and collectibles don’t signal immaturity any more than owning a home means that someone is a mature. Plenty of underdeveloped people hit all of the accepted capitalist “milestones.”
True maturity has nothing to do with what you own and everything to do with how you comport yourself as a human being. It is internal and emotional. It’s not about checking things off some Life Checklist on an arbitrary timeline. Maturity is:
- Taking action on your responsibilities
- Taking responsibility for your actions
- Having the confidence and self-awareness to own and accept who you are without harming others
Everything else is window dressing. Or Funko Pops on a shelf. I’m not gonna tell grown adults how to decorate.
(featured image: Teresa Jusino)
