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Who Amongst Us Hasn’t Called Animal Control on a Croissant?

Who you calling flakey?

 

Croissant

It’s a tale as old as time: A woman confuses a delicious pastry, a.k.a. a flaky croissant, with an animal and calls animal control. And honestly, it could’ve happened to anybody.

The croissant incident happened in Krakow, Poland. Animal welfare workers in the city were called to check out an unusual animal hanging around a residential area. According to Euronews, there was “desperation” in the woman’s voice as she sounded the alarm when it came to the distressed animal and the community that this happened in.

For two days, this menace terrorized the Krakow community with its vagueness. “People aren’t opening their windows because they’re afraid it will go into their house,” the woman explained, which is totally valid. If I saw some vague thing hanging from a tree, I’m not going to approach it to investigate. I’m going to close my window and hope it doesn’t come in.

But this lady did the right thing. Sure, it ended up being a delicious croissant that gave the officials a laughing attack. But the fact remains that this woman kept an eye out on the poor creature that hadn’t moved for days. And when she became concerned, she called animal welfare workers to help her community and this poor headless and legless creature.

Also, look up “big croissant” or “world’s biggest croissant”on Google. They’re no joke, and they can be huge. Now imagine you have poor eyesight or can’t get a clear view of the brown menace in your tree cuz it’s nighttime or too high up? Anyone could be confused by what it was and wouldn’t have guessed that a large, golden brown croissant was just hanging around.

Honestly, we all have a story of being freaked out by something only to find out it’s something else. Like this one time, I woke up, sick as a dog and without my glasses, and wandered into the hallway. I spotted a shoe and thought, “What are you doing here? And why do you have one lace?” Then it started wiggling and I realized that it was no shoe. It was a rat!

Seriously, it was the stuff of nightmares, but only one out of many memories of me confusing something with something else. And no matter your age, you’ve experienced this, from thinking that pile of clothes in the corner is something crouched down and ready to pounce, to thinking you see something standing at the corner of your vision to just see it’s the new trashcan.

All true stories worth a good laugh.

But there are some things left unsolved. What led to this croissant in a tree? What angry citizen, in a moment of pain and suffering, decided that they needed to sacrifice their croissant to the tree gods? Did they throw it around like a boomerang? Where can you buy big croissants out in the wild? And were they disappointed it wasn’t a chocolate croissant?

The world may never truly know.

(image: Abdulrhman Elkady/Pexels)

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Lyra (She/Her) is a queer Latinx writer who stans badass women in movies, TV shows, and books. She loves crafting, tostones, and speculating all over queer media. And when not writing she's scrolling through TikTok or rebuilding her book collection.