Donald Trump was indicted. He’s selling a fake mugshot to prove it. And his fans are desperate to clear his name. How are they gonna do it? Go after who they see at the “source” of all of Trump’s problems: Stormy Daniels.
Daniels is at the center of Trump’s legal woes—well, in this case, anyway—after she was paid not to speak out about their affair just before the 2016 election. Trump’s “lawyer,” Michael Cohen, was already convicted over his involvement in this payment, which constituted a campaign finance violation. Cohen has already served his sentence, but Trump’s involvement is only just now being prosecuted. It’s anyone’s guess wither it will stick to him, but there’s already a far more consequential case about Trump’s election interference in progress in Georgia.
His supporters, of course, aren’t taking any of this well, as it doesn’t really jibe with their alternate reality in which Trump is being unfairly persecuted all the time. In a legendary display of online asshattery, a Trump supporter going by the name “ACKNOWLEDGE ME” posted a “sworn affidavit” that he no doubt thought was the “nail in the coffin” in the effort to prove a case against Donald Trump. Seems credible, right? After all, the background photo of this dude’s profile is a picture of Pepe the Frog dressed as Moses captioned “Let My People Go.” Now that sounds like a trustworthy source of information if I ever heard one!
As it happens, ACKNOWLEDGE ME was acknowledged by none other than Story Daniels herself. That is to say, she acknowledged him as “dumb” with a withering “bwuhahaha!” before explaining that his “smoking gun” was not a sworn affidavit at all. “It wasn’t in court or signed by a witness or notorized,” she explained. “It’s an email printed out from Cohen with typos and signed by a stage name. It was actually used to help me get out of the NDA because sending me that was a violation.”
This isn’t the first time that Trump supporters have come up with fantasies to discredit any number of negative stories about Trump, including discrediting Daniels herself, or even more bafflingly, convincing themselves that she is on Trump’s side. Let’s not forget this man, who somehow got it in his brain that Daniels was testifying on Trump’s behalf. Daniels was quick to question what he’d been smoking, because she has said multiple times that she’s willing to testify against Trump if asked. After all, it seems like nothing would give her more pleasure than a good “bwuhahaha” in Trump’s face.
(featured image: Nordin Catic/Getty Images for The Cambridge Union)
