Roy Moore Says “The Battle Rages On,” Which Is Fine, Cause It Means We Can Keep Dunking on Him

Recommended Videos

Despite losing by WAY more than a recount-worthy margin, alleged child molester and definitive loser in life and elections, Roy Moore has refused to concede the Alabama Senate seat to Doug Jones. Instead, he’s framing his loss as a religious crusade (condemning “abortion, sodomy and materialism,” the latter of which is especially ironic for someone who reportedly spent so much time hanging out in malls) and declaring “the battle rages on.”

All of this is just an unending sigh. Moore isn’t going to weasel his way into the Senate. He’s just being a narcissistic dick. Which is fine, I guess, because then we get the option of ignoring him or mercilessly mocking him. We no longer have to actually fear him.

Because her show is weekly, Samantha Bee is now responding to the election. And because she’s Samantha Bee, her commentary is A+++++++.

Post-election, we get to dunk not just on Roy Moore, but on everyone who thought the women who spoke out against him were lying. Don’t get me wrong, it is still incredibly upsetting to hear people say they think women would lie for money. (What money, by the way? Who is fronting that payroll?) But at least we can watch them and know they are not just terrible, but terrible losers.

Also, just in case you somehow missed it, please, please, please, at the very least, watch from the 4:20 mark to see Roy Moore’s spokesman power down and reboot while he learns, on air, that specifically Christian values aren’t required for elected officials.

You know what? If Roy Moore’s refusal to concede gets us more moments like that, I’m fine with it.

(image: YouTube)

Want more stories like this? Become a subscriber and support the site!

The Mary Sue has a strict comment policy that forbids, but is not limited to, personal insults toward anyone, hate speech, and trolling.—


The Mary Sue is supported by our audience. When you purchase through links on our site, we may earn a small affiliate commission. Learn more
related content
Read Article Men Are Proving the Whole Point of the Man vs. Bear Debate
A mama bear with her cubs
Read Article ‘Cabaret’ Is Back and More Timely Than Ever
the cast of cabaret with joel grey and director rebecca frecknall
Read Article Ryan Gosling’s Iconic ‘Fall Guy’ Red Carpet Surprise Is Incredible Commitment to a Bit
Ryan Gosling at the Fall Guy premiere
Read Article Which ‘Tortured Poets Department’ Song Are You Based on Your Zodiac Sign?
Taylor Swift on the album cover for The Tortured Poets Department
Read Article Foghorn Leghorn Officially Can’t Stand Seeing All These Anime Characters Beat Themselves Up
Edited photo of Foghorn Leghorn talking to Naoto in "Don't Toy With Me, Miss Nagatoro"
Related Content
Read Article Men Are Proving the Whole Point of the Man vs. Bear Debate
A mama bear with her cubs
Read Article ‘Cabaret’ Is Back and More Timely Than Ever
the cast of cabaret with joel grey and director rebecca frecknall
Read Article Ryan Gosling’s Iconic ‘Fall Guy’ Red Carpet Surprise Is Incredible Commitment to a Bit
Ryan Gosling at the Fall Guy premiere
Read Article Which ‘Tortured Poets Department’ Song Are You Based on Your Zodiac Sign?
Taylor Swift on the album cover for The Tortured Poets Department
Read Article Foghorn Leghorn Officially Can’t Stand Seeing All These Anime Characters Beat Themselves Up
Edited photo of Foghorn Leghorn talking to Naoto in "Don't Toy With Me, Miss Nagatoro"
Author
Vivian Kane
Vivian Kane (she/her) is the Senior News Editor at The Mary Sue, where she's been writing about politics and entertainment (and all the ways in which the two overlap) since the dark days of late 2016. Born in San Francisco and radicalized in Los Angeles, she now lives in Kansas City, Missouri, where she gets to put her MFA to use covering the local theatre scene. She is the co-owner of The Pitch, Kansas City’s alt news and culture magazine, alongside her husband, Brock Wilbur, with whom she also shares many cats.