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Mr. Show Comes True: 13-Year-Old Commits to USC

A 13-year-old named David Sills has verbally committed to play football for USC, ESPN reports.

Sills is six feet tall with an “off the chart” skill set, and his father says that USC “has always been his dream school.”

Not surprisingly, the sports blogs are jumping all over this one and more than gently ribbing USC coach Lane Kiffin, because it is a ridiculous story.

Here’s the thing: we not only saw this coming, but could have seen this coming 13 years ago: The number of years ago that David Sills was born, coincidentally. Specifically, in the “Recruiters” sketch on immortal sketch comedy show Mr. Show.

The “Recruiters” sketch is a short mockumentary that follows two basketball recruiters, played by David Cross and Bob Odenkirk, who relate how important it is to get talent locked in to college basketball programs at younger and younger ages. It follows them as they compete to recruit a four-year-old with their schools’ competitive degrees in cowboy and astronaut studies, a toddler, with lollipops and pacifiers, and even a pregnant woman’s fetus. And now, it is happening in real life. What’s next? A real-life competition between monks and Fat Kid Camp? Sir Lloyd Wilson Weber’s Rap: the Musical? A scientific proof that more money=better than?

Also, here is a YouTube video of David Sills playing football, courtesy of the New York Daily News.


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